Ep 92: No Good Deed...

Improvised Star Trek

USS Sisyphus

Improv, Comedy

4.9 • 573 Ratings

🗓️ 11 August 2014

⏱️ 26 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The USS Sisyphus encounters a tranports ship in need of assistance.

Improvised April 5, 2014 from a suggestion by Joe Vincent.

Featuring:

Griffen Eckstein as Ensign Leopold Lackey, Lt. Son

Sean Kelley as Lt. Cmdr. Crick Watson, Lt. Carl, a Greg

Joe Phillips as Craig, a Greg

Christopher Rathjen as Cmdr. Corbomite Hayes, a Greg

Nick Wagner as Ensign Ch'arles Lorem, a Greg

Julia Weiss as Craigette, a Greg, Lt. Beyontrice

Matt Young as Captain Julius V. Baxter, Ensign Greg

Transcript

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0:00.0	We are getting a distress signal.
0:07.3	There's a merchant ship about 12 light years from here.
0:10.2	They're having some engine trouble.
0:12.2	Lay in a course and put us at warp eight.
0:14.8	I wonder what kind of stuff they've got.
0:17.3	Merchant ship, they could have anything.
0:19.1	Spices or...
0:20.7	Right? Fuel. Stealth. Gold Press Latin.
0:23.6	Stembole friends.
0:24.6	Those, uh, those like red fish that you put in the palm of your hand curl up and it tells you your fortune.
0:31.6	Oh, I've never seen one of those. Yeah, they're pretty cool. Live panda bears.
0:35.6	There's a thriving live panda bear trade in this sector of the quadrant. Mm-hmm. Well, Yeah, they're pretty cool. Live panda bears. There's a thriving live
0:37.7	panda bear trade in this sector of the quadrant. Well, now that they're not endangered anymore,
0:42.2	we can trade them and use them just like gold. They've actually kind of become pests back on
0:46.0	Earth. They're just so many of them. They're, you know, they infest houses that. Oh, the first time
0:50.1	I visited Earth, I shot eight pandas. Greg, they look just like you, man. No, they don't. That's offensive. Oh, I'm sorry, man. How dare you? Well, you look, your furry, you've got a big tummy. Oh, you're just digging off. I'm sorry. No, that's true, though. Lauren, look, Lauren, can I come talk to you? Yeah, uh-huh. Can you just come over here?
1:11.3	Yeah, sure.
1:11.9	I just got a report that you have been saying some racially offensive things. I mean, what the fuck, dude? I'm sorry. You know, you know I'm cool. You know, I have a cousin who's whatever you are. Look, I didn't mean anything by him. He looks like a panda. You gotta be careful. Greg's people were enslaved to humanity for a hundred years.
1:31.1	Really? didn't mean anything, but I mean, he looks like a panda. You've got to be careful. Greg's people
1:27.8	were enslaved to humanity for a hundred years. Really? Yeah. Why did we do that? Why did they do that?
1:35.2	I'm not human. Humans are the worst. Right. Well, I mean, I understand why you might not know why it's
1:40.8	like a sensitive issue, but there was this long period of enslavement,
	...

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