The American news media and other top Democrats are expressing outrage at Donald Trump's

expression of hope that America might restart, start reopening by Easter in an op-ed in the

New York Times, a former newspaper, editor-in-chief blithering pervarication, the third,

ripped into the president, writing, quote,

I rip into you, president Trump, with all the furious force of my hatred of everything you stand for,

like America and business, and refusing to apologize for meaningless things.

To suggest that there might be hope at such a time as this, in dangers our entire business model.

Next, you'll be telling us not to be afraid and to stand united. If such ideas take hold,

the news media would not survive, and I for one would have to make a living using my only other

talent, which is playing harmonica while simultaneously working the foot pedal of a bass drum

at the same time my train monkey passes a hat around for spare change.

This would be a terrible come down from running the most powerful former newspaper in the country,

and it's only one of the tens of important jobs that would be destroyed if Americans

listen to your siren song of hope and unity. Any plan that would put the New York Times out of

business is a direct attack on the First Amendment itself, and is even more despicable to connect

such hope to Easter, a time when traditionally I get depressed thinking of the eternity I'm going

to have to spend in hell. This presidency must be ended immediately to make way for Joe Biden,

because if we are forced to wait till November, the man will be completely incomprehensible.

And now, sir, you have been ripped into by no less a man than blithering pervarication

the third, and I hope you feel it deeply, because otherwise I will begin to suspect that my

influence is no illusion, and indeed my entire life is a meaningless charade. Unquote.

After writing that, Mr. Third started sobbing and ran from the room. Trigger warning, I'm Andrew

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