Democrats are broadening the scope of their investigations into Donald Trump.

The investigations began, of course, with Democrats asserting that Trump and Natasha had stolen the election

right out from under the noses of rocket J. Squirrel and his faithful sidekick, Bowenkel.

When that turned out to be just some cartoon someone saw once,

Democrats turned their attention to other important matters,

like Trump's blatant attempts to obstruct justice by refusing to testify against Boris Badenoff.

Flabby faced McCarthy, Adam Schiff, the chairman of the Oxymoronic House Intelligence Committee,

has repeatedly asserted that he has personally seen evidence he can't describe,

that his convinced him of something he won't reveal that the American people need to know about,

though he can't tell them. In an interview with NBC's Chuck Kregelis,

Schiff explained why the investigations had to expand their scope, saying, quote,

I have stretched these groundless accusations about Russia just about as far as I can.

So it's time to move on to other things before reporters start to look silly for listening to a word,

I say. America deserves to know whether Trump really did strangle a prostitute after she witnessed

him giving an overdose of heroin to an Hispanic orphan, or whether that entire scenario is just

something I made up as part of a sleazy political tactic I've been living off for years.

Unquote. Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee,

Jerry Nadler, in a statement released to Adam Schiff, said, quote,

This president is so bad that I can't make up silly crap to investigate fast enough.

Money laundering, drug dealing, witness intimidation, these are just a few of the criminal

activities I can name that have nothing to do with anything. The American public wants to spend

every last penny it has, finding the answers to meaningless questions. Or if it doesn't,

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