EP 641: Why Avoidant Attachment Sabotages Every Stage of Your Relationship (Even When You Don't Want It To)
Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice
Dr. Morgan Anderson
4.7 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 8 April 2026
⏱️ 47 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
If you've ever watched a good relationship fall apart and couldn't explain why, or you've been on the receiving end of someone who kept one foot out the door, this episode is going to give you so many aha moments. We're in Part 2 of our four-part series on attachment styles and relationship development, and today we're diving deep into avoidant attachment. I'm breaking down what's actually happening in the nervous system, the brain, and the body at every single stage of relationship development, from early dating all the way through long-term partnership, and why avoidantly attached people keep sabotaging love even when they genuinely want it.
Inside the Episode:
- The core wound behind avoidant attachment
- How avoidant attachment derails connection at every stage
- The anxious-avoidant trap and why the chemistry is so electric
Ready to stop the cycle and build something that actually feels safe? I have a limited number of Private 1:1 Coaching spots open. If you're done running the same patterns and you're ready to do the real work, apply here: www.drmorgancoaching.co/esl-breakthrough
🔗 Additional Episode Links:
- Take the Free Attachment Style Quiz → https://drmorgancoaching.com/quiz
- Follow me on IG → @drmorgancoaching
- Grab my book: Grab my best selling book Love Magnet
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Let's Get Vulnerable podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Morgan Anderson, psychologist, relationship coach, attachment theory expert, creator of the ESL relationship method, author of Love Magnet and Athletic Wear Connoisseur. My mission is to help you raise yourself worth, have great relationships, and step confidently into the next level of your life. |
| 0:22.3 | Each week, two episodes will air featuring expert advice, live coaching, and tips, showing you |
| 0:28.4 | exactly how to improve your life and attract a healthy relationship. You deserve to feel empowered, |
| 0:34.8 | secure, and love. Buckle up and Let's Get Vulnerable. |
| 0:41.8 | Welcome back to the Let's Get Vulnerable podcast. |
| 0:45.5 | I'm your host, Dr. Morgan. |
| 0:47.3 | This is part two of our four-part series. |
| 0:51.5 | If you didn't catch it, on Monday, we talked about anxious attachment. Today, we're |
| 0:58.8 | going to get into the avoidant attachment style and how avoidant attachment shows up at every |
| 1:06.0 | single stage of relationship development. So we're going to go through the relationship stage framework. |
| 1:12.8 | I'm going to give you a quick review of avoid an attachment style. And then we're also just |
| 1:19.1 | going to talk about what is happening at every single stage of relationship development. |
| 1:24.6 | Why do people with avoid an attachment find themselves sabotaging their |
| 1:29.1 | relationships even when they don't want to, right? Because we all know it's one thing to be in |
| 1:36.1 | your logical brain and you have conscious thoughts about, okay, this is how I want to show up in this |
| 1:43.0 | relationship. And it's a whole |
| 1:45.3 | another ballgame when it is your subconscious, your attachment style, your nervous system. |
| 1:51.3 | There's so many forces at work that determine what you actually do in relationships |
| 1:57.7 | versus what you want to do. So today we're going to get into avoidant attachment, |
| 2:03.1 | how that shows up at every relationship stage. |
| 2:06.2 | This is going to be a good one |
| 2:07.8 | because whether you yourself have avoidant attachment |
... |
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