Ep 356 Drs. Harville Hendrix Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt Ph.D.
Marriage Therapy Radio
MTR
4.6 • 690 Ratings
🗓️ 21 January 2025
⏱️ 45 minutes
🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode of So I Married a Relationship Expert, Zach and Laura get personal with Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt—relationship experts who don’t just teach about marriage, they live it. Get ready for an intimate look at the ups and downs of their own marriage. Spoiler: it wasn’t all smooth sailing!
Harville and Helen open up about the times they nearly got divorced—twice! At one point, they even had divorce papers ready to go. But what saved them? They teach couples the very same techniques around the world. You’ll hear how a random trip to a bookstore and a “zero negativity” experiment helped them find their way back to each other. Helen also shares a funny story about trying to "fix" Harville by reorganizing his books and closet—only to realize she was driving him crazy!
From learning to approach frustrations with curiosity instead of criticism to recommitting in a powerful New Year’s Eve ceremony, their journey is full of relatable moments and inspiring takeaways. It’s a beautiful reminder that even experts have to work on their relationships, just like the rest of us.
What You’ll Learn:
- How Harville and Helen used their own tools to avoid divorce—twice!
- The story of their “zero negativity” pact and how it transformed their relationship.
- Why curiosity and asking your partner the right questions can change everything.
- The power of recommitment—even after decades together.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello and welcome back to Marriage Therapy Radio and the second installment of So I Married a Relationship expert. |
| 0:08.4 | I named this series after a 30-year-old movie called So I Married an Axe Murderer, |
| 0:13.4 | which I was excited to use as the title until our 20-something, 30-something marketing people |
| 0:20.7 | reminded me that no one knows this movie. I know it. I quote it all the time. It is one of my favorites. Heed, like Heed Paper Now! And what is the other one? That boy's head's like... I'm not kidding you. That boy's head's like Sputnik. Spherical, but quite pointy in parts. |
| 0:59.5 | Anyway, it's an eminently quotable movie. I think you should check it out, but not before. You'll check out this interview that we did with Harville Hendrix and Helen LeChelly Hunt. Harville and Helen are the co-creators are the Amago relationship therapy. It's a groundbreaking approach to couples therapy that has transformed countless relationships. I got to watch them live about a year ago, teach some of the principles of Imago, and it's truly fascinating. Their bestselling book, Getting the Love You Want, has been a cornerstone for couples, |
| 1:04.3 | looking to deepen their connection and heal their partnerships. One of the things that was the coolest |
| 1:08.0 | about this interview for me was watching how much joy they share with each other, with their clients, really with the world. Today, we'll explore their |
| 1:15.9 | insights. We'll learn about their own journey as a couple. We'll uncover practical tips that you can |
| 1:20.1 | use to strengthen your relationship. This is a very cool conversation. Stick around. |
| 1:25.1 | First of all, I want to welcome you and thank you for coming on, |
| 1:32.7 | Harville Hendricks and, sorry, Helen Le Kelly Hunt. Tell me your best story about people thinking you're Helen Hunt. Do you have one? Well, I'm grateful that my father said, called me, well, |
| 1:39.3 | first, I never used the name, my middle name, until the actress was so famous. And my father, he and my mom, |
| 1:52.5 | they had two best friends, Ray Ryan and Helen Kelly Ryan. And they wanted me to be named, |
| 2:05.1 | they named my older brother, Ray Hunt, and I'm Helen Kelly Hunt. |
| 2:08.2 | And dad said, I want her to have my initials. |
| 2:09.9 | Let's call her La Kelly. |
| 2:12.2 | So I'm unique. |
| 2:17.5 | And so that, oh, and so I kept disappointing people. |
| 2:20.7 | I would make a reservation, Helen Hunt, for decades. |
| 2:26.0 | I never used a middle name until everyone was disappointed when I showed up. |
| 2:29.5 | And I decided to use Ellen the Kelly Hunt. |
| 2:30.2 | Yeah. |
... |
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