EP 346: Reader Question - Why don’t my friends invite me out anymore?

This Naked Mind Podcast

Annie Grace

Mental Health, Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.7 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 2 January 2021

⏱️ 14 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have your friends stopping inviting you out because you no longer drink? Why does a positive change you’ve made for yourself seem like such a problem for them? How can you manage your expectations? On today’s episode, Annie Grace explores where this discomfort comes from and talks about the four characteristics of most expectations.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This is Annie Grace and you're listening to this naked mind podcast where without
0:15.2	judgment, pain or rules, we explore the role of alcohol in our lives and culture.
0:20.2	Hi, it's Annie Grace and I am answering Reader's questions and today we have this question.
0:35.6	It says, Hi Annie, my friends are really being ignorant around me not drinking.
0:40.6	I'm not invited out anymore and I annoy them because I'm not drinking.
0:45.4	What can I do and how can I handle this?
0:47.7	So such a good question.
0:49.2	Oh man, friends are so intense, right?
0:52.9	It's just such a journey.
0:55.9	I think that relationships are so important but I think that that really took me a while
1:01.7	to kind of understand and I'm going to look for something that I think will be really helpful
1:06.2	in my phone to this conversation actually because let's see here, I can find it.
1:14.8	One of the things that happens with friendships is that we have expectations of them and they
1:21.8	have expectations of us and those expectations are not always said we're talked about.
1:28.0	And so I want to talk about this a little bit because I think that what can happen within
1:33.4	a friendship is when you try to change something, nobody feels comfortable and we have to just
1:38.8	kind of recognize that.
1:39.8	But for us to expect that change was just going to go easy peasy, no problem, nothing was
1:45.4	going to be hard, it's just going to happen is not true because change no matter how
1:51.8	positive the change is, it's going to create anxiety within the friendship.
1:56.0	It's going to create difference.
1:57.6	It's going to be, and by anxiety, I don't mean like really intense anxiety, I just mean
	...

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