Ep #316: Why We Shut Down Others’ Feelings (And How It Starts in Us)

Feminist Wellness

Béa Victoria Albina

Lifecoaching, Holistic, Feminist, Self-improvement, Fatigue, Alternative Health, Feelingstuckinlife, Spirituality, Healthygut, Health & Fitness, Mindbodyconnection, Guthealth, Connectionsbetweenthoughtsandhealth, Education, Ibs, Gutmicrobiome, Feminism

4.9 • 988 Ratings

🗓️ 6 March 2025

⏱️ 26 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

#316: Have you ever caught yourself trying to fix someone's feelings instead of just listening?

In this week's episode, I dive into why we sometimes shut down others' emotions and how this habit often starts with our own relationship to feelings.

This conversation is crucial for anyone who wants to build deeper, more authentic connections with the people they care about. Whether you're the one doing the shutting down or you've been on the receiving end, there's something here for you.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/316

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is feminist wellness, and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, functional medicine expert, and life coach, Baye Victoria Albina.
0:17.6	I'll show you how to get unstuck, drop the anxiety, perfectionism, and codependency so you can live from your beautiful heart. Welcome, my love. Let's get started.
0:30.2	Hello, hello, my love. I hope this finds you doing so well. Today we're continuing with the theme of feeling our feelings. And we're starting
0:40.0	a new series that's all about something so many of us struggle with, why we shut down other people's
0:46.6	feelings and what to do about it. And this series is also for you if you've been on the other side of it,
0:53.5	if you're like, I try to share my feelings, but they shut me down. This is for for you, if you've been on the other side of it, if you're like, I try to
0:54.3	share my feelings, but they shut me down. This is for you too. Because the more we can
0:59.3	understand others, the more we can understand ourselves, the more we can have compassion,
1:02.4	the more we're interdependent, the more better the world. Right? Right. So if you've ever
1:08.1	found yourself saying things like, don't cry, it's not that bad,
1:12.3	or less obviously found yourself sort of rushing to fix someone's sadness, anger, frustration
1:19.9	by like managing them, trying to do for them, trying to change their experience,
1:25.4	trying to get them to not feel their feelings. This episode is for you.
1:31.1	We'll explore the deep-rooted reasons. This happens not to judge or shame ourselves or anyone
1:36.5	else. We don't do that around here, but to understand what's driving these patterns so we can
1:41.5	start to change them. I'll share that I started thinking about this
1:44.9	topic more in depth about year, year and a half ago, when two people I really love made it clear
1:52.6	and they made it clear time and time again, but I kept giving them the grace like we do and we love
1:59.3	people. But they made it clear that they did not
2:02.1	have the capacity to allow me to have my feelings. You see how there's no judgment in there?
2:08.3	I'm not like they were poo-pooh heads. They just didn't have the capacity, right? So on several
2:13.5	occasions, I would share my own experience, thoughts, feelings about a situation or person
	...

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