Ep. 306 - How do I build a life after my breakup that actually feels better?
How to Get Over Your Ex
Dorothy AB Johnson
4.7 • 577 Ratings
🗓️ 15 September 2025
⏱️ 18 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
When your breakup leaves you wondering how to create a life that's actually bigger and better than the one you had with your ex, the advice out there usually falls short. "Just move on," "go no contact," or "time heals all." But none of that shows you how to design a life that feels extraordinary on your terms. In this episode, I'm sharing the 3 steps of self-authorship. A framework that will help you stop living in reaction to your ex and start writing your own story. You'll learn how to decide who you are without them, how to author your emotional experience instead of being hijacked by it, and how to create experiences that make your new life impossible to ignore. If you take these 3 self authoring steps today, by the end of this week you'll feel like the main character of your own life instead of a supporting role in your ex's story.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You are listening to How to Get Over Your Ex, episode number 306. |
| 0:04.9 | How do I build a life after my breakup that actually feels better? |
| 0:19.3 | Welcome to How to Get Over Your Ex, a podcast on getting over your ex without it just taking time. |
| 0:25.5 | I'm your host, breakup coach Dorothy. |
| 0:27.7 | Let's turn your pain into power and your heartbreak into happy. |
| 0:36.1 | Hello, hello, beautiful brave hearts. |
| 0:38.1 | How are you doing? |
| 0:39.6 | I'm so excited to be here with you today to talk about something called self-authorship. |
| 0:46.4 | If you take these three self-authoring steps today, by the end of this week, you will be feeling like the main character of your |
| 0:56.7 | own life instead of a supporting role in your ex's story. Okay. So when it comes to breakups, |
| 1:05.6 | heartbreak, betrayal, divorce, the goal really isn't about moving on or getting over someone. Hear me out |
| 1:13.6 | for a second. Like yes, we want to do those things and they will happen. But to me, the real |
| 1:21.1 | goal is becoming someone who knows how to and is confident in their ability to author their own experience |
| 1:30.3 | no matter what life throws their way. Okay. Now the individuals who create that experience |
| 1:37.9 | are the ones who really aren't, you know, waiting for time to heal or letting breakup rules |
| 1:42.5 | like going no contact, get in their way they |
| 1:45.2 | don't wait for their ex to come back they genuinely do craft the story so that they get what |
| 1:51.7 | they want no matter who's in the life like in their life or not in their life they ultimately |
| 1:59.0 | become the author of their own story through what I call self-authorship. |
| 2:04.9 | So to me, self-authorship is deciding who you are without your ex, redirecting your emotional |
| 2:12.3 | energy, embracing uncertainty, rewriting your beliefs, and actively creating experiences that feel bigger and better. |
| 2:22.8 | And here's why this matters so much. Your bigger and better life is not a destination. It is not |
... |
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