Ep. 173: It's Time To Talk About Stonewalling
The Baggage Reclaim Sessions
Natalie Lue
4.9 • 867 Ratings
🗓️ 6 March 2020
⏱️ 59 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Have you ever experienced stonewalling in a relationship (or possibly engaged in it yourself)? In another episode about understanding and improving communication in our intimate relationships, Natalie breaks down stonewalling including delving into three common scenarios:
- Shutting down expressing of feelings, thoughts and concerns.
- Using stonewalling and silent treatment to communicate displeasure or be punitive.
- Stonewalling and then blindsiding with a breakup.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions. |
| 0:08.0 | Hello hello. How are you doing? |
| 0:12.0 | It's good to be back after being laid out with a cold last week. |
| 0:16.0 | Before I get into today's very interesting topic, |
| 0:20.0 | a quick reminder, if you would like to join me at one of my workshops I have got a |
| 0:25.9 | couple coming up one is on March 21st and I'll be running it from my studio |
| 0:30.9 | here in Surrey which is right on the edge of London in |
| 0:34.5 | catering where I live and I've also got another event the same one actually on |
| 0:40.6 | May 24th in New York. These are my break the cycle workshops. This is where I take people through a seven step process to help them to uncover and begin healing their pattern, a pattern that will not actually |
| 0:59.4 | just have affected their relationship experiences, but has potentially been affecting for instance their work as well or even how they are engaging for instance with family or friends. |
| 1:10.0 | If you'd like to find out more about these workshops, you can do so at baggage reclaim. |
| 1:15.1 | K.k.k. |
| 1:19.2 | Okay. What am I talking about today? I mentioned a few weeks back in episode 170 that over the next couple of months or so I want to address the topic of communication in our intimate relationships. |
| 1:36.4 | I want to stress, that doesn't mean just romantic relationships, that's any of our close relationships. In that episode I explained the five stages of |
| 1:45.4 | relationships and navigating conflict, something incidentally that often a |
| 1:51.0 | stumbling block for people, but is actually part of deepening intimacy in our |
| 1:56.1 | relationships and becoming more self-aware. Of all of the topic suggestions I've received on the subject of communication and yes conflict, the issue of silence, especially around stonewalling and silent treatment is by far the most reference, the most requested. |
| 2:19.0 | The health and wealth of our intimate relationships, romantic and otherwise, depends on verbal and non-verbal |
| 2:27.3 | communication and whether we are collaborative and cooperative to the betterment, not just of the relationship, but to ourselves. |
| 2:37.6 | Our ability and willingness to broach concerns and problem solve, to express our innermost thoughts and feelings, to recover and |
| 2:46.6 | grow from conflict and criticism, is a crucial component of intimacy. |
| 2:53.6 | Whether it's that we avoid these things |
... |
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