Ep #171: Rescuing vs Supporting
Feminist Wellness
Béa Victoria Albina
4.9 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 26 May 2022
⏱️ 32 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
#171: Tune in this week as I show you why and how we embody the trope of the rescuer. You’ll discover the difference between the desire to rescue and supporting, and why recognizing this difference is crucial for healing codependent thought habits. I’m also sharing the remedies for stepping out of the rescuer role, and how supporting others is the basis for an interdependent framework for living.
Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/171
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is feminist wellness and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, functional medicine expert and life coach Victoria Albina. I'll be full heart. Welcome my love let's get started. |
| 0:26.7 | Hello hello my love I hope this finds you doing so well. This week I want to talk about this key component of |
| 0:38.2 | cod dependent thinking which is the misguided belief that it is our job to rescue others. |
| 0:46.0 | So today we'll be talking about the trope of the rescuer, |
| 0:50.0 | why and how we do it and what we can do instead, which is to be supportive to the people we love. |
| 0:57.0 | Co-dependent thinking is this really fascinating thing where we're constantly seeking other people's opinions, validation, and |
| 1:05.9 | approval because the story in our minds and bodies goes, I need them to constantly approve to me that it's okay for me to feel loved and |
| 1:17.3 | lovable to feel okay valid worthy in this life and my my nerds, because we're not embodied in our sense of worthiness, |
| 1:26.8 | we feel this constant need to seek evidence, to support the hypothesis that it's actually okay for us to be alive and to take of all this darn oxygen. |
| 1:38.0 | So in order to try to gain that external approval, we do things for other people that they can very well do for themselves and we often do things that they didn't even |
| 1:48.0 | ask us to do or don't even want us to do because the subconscious story in our minds that often comes from our inner children, |
| 1:55.7 | from what we learn by watching the adults in our lives, is one of the two primary thought |
| 2:02.1 | tendencies I see in my clients in Ancard. |
| 2:05.0 | And of course there are folks who are one way in some relationships and other ways and others. |
| 2:11.0 | And I see that over archingly either we carry a belief that we are not |
| 2:17.0 | capable of handling our own lives and we ourselves need rescued. |
| 2:22.7 | We need to be told how to do our lives in every way, |
| 2:26.5 | how to adult. |
| 2:28.6 | And this tends to be a form of anxious attachment |
| 2:31.7 | driving this particular bus or |
| 2:34.4 | a la avoidant attachment we swing the other direction and over function |
| 2:40.3 | we are wildly independent and we believe that we can do everything all by ourselves. Thank you very much. |
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