Ep. 135: In The Beginning... There Were Blind Spots
The Baggage Reclaim Sessions
Natalie Lue
4.9 • 867 Ratings
🗓️ 12 April 2019
⏱️ 20 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Natalie talks about blind spots and why we've got to stop clinging to assumptions about what a relationship-worthy person looks like (hint: it's more than "charming, good-looking, smart") or them claiming that they're in therapy, meditators or working in a particular profession.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions. |
| 0:08.0 | Hello. |
| 0:10.0 | This episode isn't going to be a long one. I have a sore throat and a rather tickly cough, but also I'm just naked. |
| 0:18.0 | But I didn't want to miss this week. |
| 0:22.0 | What I want to talk about is something that so many people are affected by but |
| 0:29.0 | they don't necessarily realize it. And I was watching the trailer for the Ted Bundy tapes a while back. |
| 0:39.0 | It's a documentary on Netflix about the notorious serial killer Ted Bundy and there's a line |
| 0:47.1 | towards the end of the trailer that immediately caught my attention and I |
| 0:51.8 | actually sort of rewound several times just to hear it because I've heard |
| 0:56.8 | variations of this for the almost 14 years that I have been you know running baggage reclaim and it was this. |
| 1:06.0 | He was charming, good looking, smart. |
| 1:09.2 | Are you sure you have the right guy? |
| 1:12.2 | And actually there was another line in there as well he didn't look |
| 1:14.7 | like anybody's notion of somebody who would tear apart young girls. Now no today's |
| 1:21.8 | topic is not about serial killers. It is, however, about the assumptions that we make |
| 1:28.0 | about people that cause us to have blind spots. Because a lot of the time people are basically telling me stories about a relationship |
| 1:39.7 | or situation that basically didn't turn out as they expected and wanted it to. |
| 1:46.3 | A lot of the time they talk about in the beginning. In the beginning he or she was just so great |
| 1:51.4 | they were so attentive they were so intense they were crazy about me they wanted to be around me all the time |
| 1:56.1 | They said they couldn't believe that they met somebody like me. Why didn't stay like it was in the beginning? |
| 2:01.5 | Because it was the beginning and because we don't know people in the beginning and |
| 2:07.0 | when we expect people to stay exactly as they were in the beginning, it's like saying, I don't want you to grow. |
... |
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