This episode is brought to you by Slack. With Slack, you can bring all your people and

tools together in one place. It's your digital HQ where you can increase productivity,

enable flexibility and automate workflows. Plus, Slack is full of game-changing features

like huddles for quick check-ins or Slack Connect, which helps you connect with partners

inside and outside of your company. Slack, where the future works. Get started at

Slack.com slash DHQ. A woman wearing a mask who claims to be Dr. Deborah Birx, but let's face,

it could be anybody, recently commented on the current surge in the Chinese flu or the

Wu flu or the Kong flu or the Shaikon flu or the Andrew Cuomo death bug as it is known

among terrified New York old people. The alleged Dr. Birx, who claims to be the White House

coronavirus response coordinator, but may not even be Dr. Birx, let alone the White House

coronavirus response coordinator said quote, and this is a real quote. She said, only we

can save us from the current surge and we know precisely what to do. When reporters

asked the putative Dr. Birx to elaborate on what precisely we precisely know, precisely

to do, she said quote, we must wear the masks. We didn't have to wear, but now should

wear though they won't protect us if they're worn beneath the nose or above the mouth

or over the face, though they may protect your grandmother, who of course is already dead

if she lives in New York State. Then we must shut restaurants unless they're serving rich

people and stop celebrating any holiday that suggests there's a spiritual power in the

universe higher than your local public officials. Those who are already ill must die alone in

order to discourage others from going outdoors where there is no danger of catching the virus

unless you're indoors and wearing a mask which would be useless in that situation. Everyone

must stay at home except those delivery people who have to bring us our food while we move

...