Yeah, so Hamish is someone who I'd actually describe as a normal drinker, as I said.

Like him, I thought my crazy behaviour was totally normal, like I did all those things in Lao and Thailand like you did.

I was just a party girl with no off switch as far as I was concerned.

Drinking was so ingrained in me that I thought it was normal to vomit in a wheelie bin every weekend, fall over and taxi rangs and blow my fingers off with fireworks. I thought drinking was fun. I thought that behaviour was fun. When in fact I had a tintsy, wincey bit of a drink problem that actually needed therapy to unravel. So let's list some of the ways listeners can identify if they are sober curious, Vic.

Yeah, it's a great idea because it is a hard thing to sort of pinpoint for those that are listening.

If you relate to any of these, it might be time to put down your pint.

One of the first ones is if you are not able to stop at one, that's a classic sign of you,

you're being almost obsessed with alcohol because you can't just have that one drink.

You're failing at moderation.

Of course, if you can't have one drink, it means that you want another one, which means you want another one.

And it's like you have no control of it.

So we're going to really simplify things here for you guys just to try and identify a few issues here. I guess similar to that, people that think one drink is pointless. Yeah, I would say that still now that one drink, I'd be like, why the fuck you're bothering? In fact, even now that I've been sober five years and I see someone having one drink, I'm still kind of, there's a part of me that's like, come on, what's wrong with you? Get another one down your neck. I'm almost disappointed in people. I think because I can't do it anymore. I want them to sort of do it instead, but it's bad. Yeah. Another obvious one is if you're really just not happy with drinking anymore. Yeah, if it's impacting you in a weird way, whether that's anxiety or you're just questioning it or you keep doing stupid things or it makes you have arguments with people or it makes you,

you know, have an argument with your partner.

All of these things, if you're not happy with it, it might be time to change it.

The next one is, yeah, exactly that, feel in need of change, which if you feel in your heart that something's not right, it's probably time to have a look into it. Particularly if you've crossed off all the other things. Yes, yeah. It's not that. It's not that. Yeah. It's not that. Yeah. A lot of people I talk to actually go to the doctors and the doctor says, You've got this, you've checked this, you've checked this, but are you still drinking? And everyone I know says, no, no, doctor, I've given up drinking. But of course they are. It's the one thing they always deny. But the drink is often the key to a lot of health issues that we talk about. So we'll go more into that in a few other episodes. Yeah. One that I can relate to is this

idea of just being a bit bored of the drinking culture. Yeah, it's fucking boring sometimes, Hamish. Like, oh, I've got to go. I remember I used to dread going out in the end because I feel, oh, bloody hell, here I go again. I'm going to go. I'm going to get, I'm going to be the drunkest person in the room. I'm going to fall over and make a tit out of myself and then I'm going to have

huge anxiety the next day. I knew my patterns so well and I was bored of it by the end of it. Yeah, well, you can sort of imagine how the night's going to go. I know we're going to have this many drinks. I know these conversations are going to happen again. We're going to end up at that place. Yeah. You know, it's just on repeat after, we've done it for years. I've done it for fucking years, 25 years.

Yeah.

So one thing that you might feel in that situation is you're actually craving better relationships like those bonding situations that you're out with your mate at that same club and you're talking about the same thing. You're not actually going to remember any of those conversations the next day. So you might actually not be bonding as well. And is it possible to bond more deeply if you're not drinking?

Yeah.

That one's a good one because you always think, oh, for a few drinks, we always get these amazing deep chats, you know? I feel really connected. Oh, you're drunk. You don't remember it the next day. No, it's like pointless, isn't it? Yeah, the point is trying to get to that level of conversation without the boo so you can actually remember it and actually connect with that person.

And that's going to be a challenge for you that will set you at some point to go out on a boost. of conversation without the boo so you can actually remember it and actually connect with that person.

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