COVIDIOT-In-Chief
Titus Podcast
Christopher Titus
4.6 • 2.3K Ratings
🗓️ 9 October 2020
⏱️ 84 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Didn't this past week feel like an entire YEAR?? In the Armageddon Update, Titus covers the roller coaster ride that is this president. Titus, Bombshell, and the Hylinder keep it oddly light during this heavy time... because it can't get any worse, right? RIGHT??
#TitusPodcast ...because the world is a clown show.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Yo, everybody, this is Willie Jello Johnson for the Tadus podcast, brought you today by Molecule, |
| 0:12.5 | the best air purifier on the market and Harris Razors with the new shopper blades. |
| 0:19.0 | How is that possible? |
| 0:20.7 | And now with the Armageddon |
| 0:21.7 | Update, Christopher Titus. I'm Christopher Titus and this is the Armageddon update. So how |
| 0:29.2 | was your previous week? That felt like it lasted two damn years. Yeah, since the last |
| 0:33.7 | time we talked it's only been seven days and we've had history write us a brand new testament of stupidity. |
| 0:41.2 | Jesus would have wept, but I think Jesus just got tired of this bullshit and finally flipped |
| 0:45.1 | tables in the White House. |
| 0:46.8 | Trump has COVID. |
| 0:48.8 | First, he announced that he got it from Hope Hicks, who had been hugging cops and the military. |
| 0:53.6 | Yeah, always blame the police and the military. Trump could have just said, yeah, been hugging cops and the military. Yeah, always blame the police and |
| 0:55.1 | the military. Trump could have just said, yeah, she got it from the losers and the suckers. |
| 1:00.2 | So Hope Hicks started showing symptoms on Wednesday when Trump was at a rally. Oh, and she was, |
| 1:06.0 | you know, with him. Totally infectious. The president met with Gold Star families that weekend. Then he had a COVID |
| 1:12.1 | cotillion at the White House for his SCOTUS pick, where Lindsey Graham even exclaimed, |
| 1:16.6 | my God, I feel so faint. It smells so contagious in here. The White House on Sunday had a higher |
| 1:23.8 | contagion rate than fucking New Zealand. Then on Thursday, the White House announced |
| 1:29.2 | that Hope had it. Who knew that the most dangerous phrase in 2020 would be, get positive, |
| 1:35.7 | hug Hope. Now, we know hope kills. Finally, for the first time in four years, the news from |
| 1:41.3 | the White House is positive. Sorry, Trump has COVID. How is that |
| 1:46.9 | possible? He's been so careful and followed the science to the letter. So if you track it, |
... |
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