Cat-or-Dogical Imperative

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

World, Show, Complete, Hodgeman, Comedy, Pc, Daily, Hodgman, Mac, More, Expertise, Knowledge, Information

4.8 • 7.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 November 2020

⏱️ 54 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Alan files suit against his wife, Elaine. Alan thinks their cat, Muffin, needs a companion. He’d like to get another cat. Elaine, however, would prefer adding a dog to their family. Who’s right? Who’s wrong?

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bail of Jesse Thorn. This week, cat or
0:07.9	dog-a-go imperative. Allen files suit against his wife Elaine. Allen thinks their cat muffin
0:14.8	needs a companion. He'd like to get another cat. Elaine, however, would prefer to add a
0:20.1	dog to their family. Who's right? Who's wrong? Only one can decide. Please rise. As Judge
0:26.4	John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.
0:33.7	You're very handy. I can tell. I beg you like to podcast a lot too.
0:38.5	Podcasting is dead. Oh, that's very fascinating. I podcast a lot myself. Some people think I'm too
0:44.8	intellectual, but it's a fabulous way to spend your spare time. I also play racquetball. Do you
0:49.5	have any hobbies like swearing litigants in? Allen, Elaine, please rise and raise your right hands.
0:55.9	Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God or whatever?
1:02.0	We do. Yes. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite the fact that he's
1:08.2	currently in talks to star in a remake of the 1970s Disney sequel, The Shaggy DA?
1:14.5	Yes. We do. Yes. It's got a great theme song, sort of music, Manny. Judge Hodgman, you may
1:22.4	proceed. How does the Shaggy DA theme song go, Jesse? We're gonna elect Tim Marshaaggy.
1:30.5	Gonna elect Tim Marshaaggy DA. But then there's like a pattern part. Oh, is that really it?
1:38.8	What? Yeah, the verses are pattern and that's how the chorus goes. I don't have the verses committed
1:44.3	to memory. I'm glad I didn't have Allen and Elaine be seated because I'm sure they wanted to dance
1:50.1	to that and they did a good job. Yeah. Well, they certainly would have been roused because it was a
1:54.4	rousing rendition. Yeah. Allen and Elaine, please be seated for an immediate summary judgment in one
1:59.3	of yours favors. Can either of you name the piece of popular culture that I and our bail of
2:06.0	Jesse Thorn are a phrase? I'll give you a hint. The word podcast was not in this actual quote. We
2:12.0	swapped that in for something else. Can either of you name the piece of popular culture that we sort
	...

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