If it ever crosses your mind that the person can't handle what you're going to say to them,

what you want to say to them, if you ever think that they're too weak or incapable,

those absolutely are key indicators that you're in it, that you're in the caretaking side of things.

Welcome to the art of accomplishment, where we explore how deepening connection with ourselves

and others leads to creating the life we want with enjoyment and ease.

I'm Brett Kisler, here today with my co-host, Joe Hudson.

What is wrong with making people feel better?

When a lot of us think of codependency, we think of alcoholism or we think of addiction, a lot of the extreme examples.

But codependence is something that we really do a lot in our daily lives.

And this happens in very subtle ways in relationships personally and in business.

So today we're going to talk about the difference between care and caretaking.

So Joe, today I want to talk about something that we've all dealt with before,

which is a really common scenario where you want to make somebody feel better.

And you think that this is going to help.

And you do something specifically with the goal of making them feel better.

And it actually just ends up making things worse in the long run.

And we've talked about that in your courses and that we've labeled it the term caretaking,

which sounds a lot like care.

And people think about care is a good thing. And then caretaking

becomes this thing that kind of is a disempowering aspect. So what is caretaking? And how did you come

across this as a concept worthy of inquiry? Semantically speaking, you could call it like

codependence or caretaking. And just for the sake of this conversation,

...