Can You Don't? | Witness Birth. Frog Cop. Wax Joint. Infected Spots.
Can You Don't?
Joe Paisley and Bryan Albrandt
4.3 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 14 January 2026
⏱️ 82 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Call us old fashioned, but the words "good father" don't usually belong in the same sentence as "threw an infant across the room into the bed frame." Let's talk about that, when a change in plans goes from thinking you're about to do something awesome to re-painting your house, wiping up tears using a foil hotdog wrapper, losing your virginity with the help of a wax joint, and more on today's episode of Can You Don't?!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Witness birth, frog cop, wax joint, infected spots. This reminds me of a certain sublime song |
| 0:24.7 | What's one? |
| 0:26.8 | 187. |
| 0:27.8 | Oh, |
| 0:28.2 | yeah. |
| 0:29.1 | I feel like we referenced the same song when we hit episode on episode 87. |
| 0:34.6 | We can finally bring up sublime. We've just been waiting so long. Ah, yeah. 187. Thank you guys for joining in for another episode of Can You Don't podcast. Uh-oh. Oh, man. Did you even mean to do that? You just... As soon as you would podcast. |
| 0:55.0 | Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. It's all about me. The news was on this morning when we were, I was going through the script and kind of just finalizing some stuff and news is in the background. And I can't help it. News was on when we got here. When's, yeah. That's how much I'd rounded out. I don't even know when it turned on or when it's probably still going right now. |
| 1:12.5 | Probably. |
| 1:12.9 | But whenever a word that they say, Yeah, that's how much I drowned it out. I don't even know when it turned on or when it's probably still going right now. |
| 1:12.5 | Probably. |
| 1:12.9 | But whenever a word that they say comes off a little funny, I can't help but repeat it. |
| 1:17.3 | You go down that deep. |
| 1:18.3 | And they go, they go 35. |
| 1:21.1 | And I'm sitting at my desk, I go five. |
| 1:24.3 | It's a involuntary pie. |
| 1:27.1 | Tonight in a football game. |
| 1:29.0 | American football game. |
| 1:30.8 | 7.30 p.m. |
| 1:32.1 | What's that, Joe? |
| 1:33.2 | Nothing. |
| 1:33.7 | Nothing. |
... |
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