I know.

It's my new clone.

Happy Tuesday, everyone.

So the DOJ is looking into how Ilhan Omar's husband's wine business jumped from $1 to $5 million in 2024.

He says it was all due to just one new customer.

J.B. Pritzker refused to answer if a man could become a woman.

In his defense, it's hard to be an expert at genitalia when you can't see your own.

That's fair. Fair observation. Yeah, it's on a milk carton somewhere. Families in Minneapolis

School District were offered free tickets to see Hillary Clinton at Target Center next week.

It's part of a package deal where families can also get free passes to see Bill Clinton at Target Center next week. It's part of a package deal where families can also get free passes to see Bill Clinton at Hooters.

He'll be signing breasts.

Chicken. Dylan Mulvaney has been cast as Ann Bolin in the Broadway musical Six. Well, I guess they have something in common.

They both didn't want their heads cut off.

Oh, it's okay.

Why would you clap for something so disgusting?

A Pennsylvania man is accused of stealing dozens of bones,

skulls, and human remains from a historic cemetery.

Well, he could have saved time and visited Delaware.

The inventor of the suicide pod just revealed a new feature that will allow couples to die together.

He said it's called getting married.

Sources claim Megan Markle's Netflix show, With Love will not be returning for a third season.

Also not returning for a third season,

...