Hello everybody we're back more more more. Wow she's really outdone herself. You know as someone who's been podcasting since you know the days of pteridactyls in the sky,

he soos roaming the streets in a loin cloth,

and basically like technology not even being a thing.

There are a lot of episodes that have just kind of been collecting dust, rightfully so, in the trenches of the interwebs.

And now that I'm a new mom and I'm just reflecting on my life, digitally speaking, a decade

in, I have had the grandiose misfortune of spending an obscene amount of time these past couple

weeks listening to old episodes and the only thing I can tell you is that it has

been truly the most humbling experience of my life.

I cannot tell you that anything that exists is more embarrassing than my early episodes. I definitely

started to catch my flow I would say no sooner than three and a half to four years

in the first few years are just what can only be

described as the most blatantly disgusting atrocious lack of self-awareness.

I have never heard someone.

So inadequate, so inarticulate, so

stupid, so fraudulent. so And I couldn't I wasn't even in the game. I wasn't on a team. I wasn't in a league. I wasn't on the field. I didn't have a ball within five miles of me. I I really thought that I was just chomping at the bit.

And when I listened back to this person 10 years ago, just struggling through and through while simultaneously thinking that I am just the most

talented person in the world is so sad and so deeply,

deeply embarrassing.

Not in a like, oh my God, braces,

like no, no, like in the truest way I was I've always trusted myself

which is weird because I shouldn't but I've always trusted that like my intentions are good

I don't have a lot of like skeletons in the closet. I'm not worried about being unfiltered, uncensored, unedited because I know who I am intrinsically and anything that I ever said that was off base

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