Berner Phone #118: Local Gossip

Berner Phone

Hannah Berner and Des Bishop

Stand-up, Comedy

4.4 • 5.6K Ratings

🗓️ 24 November 2025

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We'd rather get involved in other people's drama than deal with our own, so we asked the dialers to tell us their juiciest local gossip.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, it's Hannah Burner.
0:03.7	And Des Bishop.
0:04.7	Thanks for calling the burner phone.
0:06.6	If you leave a message after the tone, we may have to make it into a podcast.
0:14.5	Hello, my little dialers.
0:16.8	I just have to warn you guys.
0:19.8	Does and I have both come ill?
0:22.6	You don't...
0:23.2	It's not cholera.
0:24.4	It's not cholera, but...
0:26.5	We are sick, but don't worry.
0:28.3	It won't come through your headphones or your speaker or even your Bluetooth that I don't trust.
0:34.4	Right.
0:34.8	Well, I have to say that my throat is in much worse shape than you at the moment.
0:40.1	So, we're not competing over who's more sick. No, but what I am is I'm actually apologizing to
0:45.8	the dialers for, I really am in a bad way on the old throat front. So I'm, I'm going to require
0:53.0	you to really carry the load on this one.
0:56.2	Think of me as a producer of our gossip episode.
1:00.8	Well, that's great because I am really good at gossiping.
1:05.0	I actually minored in gossiping in college.
1:09.5	And I was the one who thought of the idea of local neighborhood gossip for this week.
1:14.9	Yes.
	...

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