Before You Say Something You Regret — Ask Yourself This

Negotiate Anything

American Negotiation Institute

Education, Business, Self-improvement

4.7 • 748 Ratings

🗓️ 29 May 2025

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

One bad reaction can destroy the trust you spent years building. In this episode, forensic psychologist and leadership expert Nashater Deu Solheim joins Kwame Christian to unpack the hidden emotional triggers that sabotage high-stakes conversations. You’ll learn how to recognize defensiveness before it takes over, use silence as a power move, and ask the one question that keeps you in control — even when you’re about to explode. Whether you're leading a team, navigating conflict, or trying to be heard without losing your cool, this episode gives you the practical tools to respond with clarity instead of emotion. You’ll discover: Why most feedback feels like an attack (and how to fix it) The ABC model for building trust in every conversation How to use body language to send the right message — without saying a word Why asking “why” makes people shut down A simple mindset shift that instantly lowers the emotional temperature Master the moment — before it masters you. Connect with Nashater Deu Solheim Progressing Minds⁠ ⁠The Leadership Pin Code⁠ ⁠Follow Nashater on LinkedIn⁠ Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Nasata, thanks for joining us today.
0:02.1	Great to be with you, Kwame. Thanks for involving me.
0:04.5	It is our pleasure, my friend.
0:06.1	So how can you get us started by telling us a little bit about yourself and what you do?
0:09.7	So I am a psychologist in background.
0:12.9	I have trained as a clinical and forensic psychologist.
0:16.1	And really what that means is I've worked with some pretty challenging people
0:19.7	and people who've been in challenging situations. So I worked in maximum security environment with offenders and those
0:26.8	who might be chastikide as psychopaths and went on to work with the military, returning from war zones,
0:32.8	treating post-traumatic stress disorder and head injuries, and my work with leaders, coaching them in the
0:38.2	schools that I was trained in, in having effective influence and working with negotiation,
0:42.7	which is perhaps what brings me here with you today.
0:45.2	Absolutely. And you have a book that's out. Can you tell us about that too?
0:50.1	I do. I have a book that was released last year, my first book, my only book, called The Leadership Pin Code, Unlocking the Key to Willing and Winning Relationships.
1:00.2	And essentially, it's a handbook for leaders on the very practical tips that I've learnt, and I'm now sharing with them, on how they can have those impactful conversations, building trust in relationships,
1:12.6	and very much about how you can do that in every conversation, every day.
1:17.7	Okay.
1:18.4	Now, for the listeners, they might say, wow, that book sounds fascinating.
1:22.3	I should buy that.
1:23.0	And they should say that.
1:24.1	And they should say also, your work is really fascinating.
1:27.4	But they might not see
	...

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