We'll have you know that Barry Diller and I are working on a whole new approach to media, combining all the digital...

God!

Just let me break!

T-B-T-L!

Soon enough my pretties will all be getting our chance to take a sip

because it is a Friday afternoon edition of T-B-T-L

the show that is probably too beautiful to live.

We've turned the radio dial with a snarl, then one day they tell me they suddenly realized I was talking to them.

This is episode 631 in a collector's series.

My name is Luke Burbank, I'm your host.

I got on the scale today and quite to my surprise it read 180 pounds, which would represent about a 5 pound weight loss.

Based on eating chimichangas and drinking Budweiser, then I looked underneath the scale and realized one of the little footing parts is actually cracked, which means it's just inaccurate.

That's the saddest thing I've ever heard.

So I don't really know what exactly my weight is, but I'm going to continue to believe it's 180.5.

We've got a really exciting program for you here on this Friday.

Hi, this is Luke, Mom, Suzy coming tonight on T-B-T-L.

When exactly is the right time to respond to a heckler if you're doing stand-up comedy?

And really more to the point, when is the right time to just scream a string of expletives at him at the top of your lungs?

Michaelian Black will join us to tell us where he's coming down on that particular decision based on an event that happened to him in Ohio this week.

Also, Bu Davis, quilter extraordinaire, author of the new book Dare to Be Square, is here.

As we speak, setting up some kind of quilting apparatus in the other room, this is going to be the most crafty edition of T-B-T-L ever.

As I said on the T-B-T-L website, Bu Davis is not your mom's quilting.

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