Hey, welcome back to the Personality Hacker Podcast. My name is Joe Mark Witt.

And I'm Antonia Dodge.

So I was raised in this family that apology and forgiveness was really important.

It was tied into our religious expression, most likely.

I think that's pretty much where it came from.

As a little kid, some of the most humiliating times in my life were feeling like I'd wronged somebody

and my parents making me go and apologize to that person and not just saying hey I'm sorry for the

behavior but will you forgive me asking the person requesting

forgiveness from the person that I wronged in order to make it right with them

whether it was you know breaking another child's toy or offending an adult I was around or whatever it was

I had to go and apologize say hey I'm really sorry for this behavior will you forgive me and

I was supposed to you know receive the forgiveness it was given

if it wasn't given I was never really given instruction on what to do I never

really had any time when I apologize as a kid and someone wouldn't forgive me.

In fact, my whole life I had never actually experienced that except about 10, maybe 11 years ago,

I was in my ex-wife's mother's house and my ex wife and I were having some

heavy conversation. It was on the verge of getting to an argument we had had over and over and over again, a repetitive argument,

and I felt really pinned in and like, you know, like my ego was on the line in this moment.

And remember, standing up and yelling and pounding my fist on the

dining room table walking out of the room, slamming the door of the room behind me and

stomping up the steps to the bedroom we were staying at at the time. And I got up there and I thought,

oh man, I just really behaved badly. I just yelled, I ranted and raved in somebody else's

...