It seems that everything in the world is driven by some sort of performance.

If someone performs poorly at a job, they often get fired.

Or if you get mistreated by somebody, you can kind of retaliate or set a boundary by deleting their number or their

contact information. In marriage, there are mess-ups all the time, and you can't cut somebody off

or fire them for poor performance. Sometimes your spouse needs a little bit of grace. I'm John Fuller,

joined by Aaron and Greg Smalley, who lead the

Focus Marriage Department, and we're going to hear now a clip from Focus on the Family with Jim

Daily. Jim spoke with Brad and Marilyn Rhodes and talked about what it looks like to remember

our own need for grace. Marilyn, you mentioned in the book this idea of rescue mentality in your marriage. It sounds great. What does it mean?

Well, I mean, this is another where you take the verse. Yet while I was a sinner, Christ died for me. He rescued us. And while Brad's a sinner and I'm a sinner, we lay down our lives for one another. So when we're struggling, because like Brad's, life's

hard. It throws a lot of tough things at us. And then you, you bring to the table our flesh that

naturally wants to rise at times that we, it's when you have a rescue mentality and you have a

grace mentality, you get over things so much faster because it's God's kindness that leads to repentance.

It doesn't give a jerk license. You were asking earlier, does this give someone a free pass

when I went to Brad and shared? My hope is in Christ. It really, I think it's more exposing

of sin when you have a kind response. I know when Brad's come in and I'm with the kids and especially

when they were little and I had it up to my eyeballs with kids and I'm short and I'm throwing a

baby at him and maybe not talking to another child like I should. I can remember a specific time.

I really was, I was blowing it at the house.

And Brad walked in and kind of looked around, and he just jumped in and started helping.

And he grabbed one of the kids that was on my every nerve and took him for a walk around the block.

Well, that just left me to deal with myself.

...