93: Approximate Week IV: OblIVion (Joseph and Aseneth)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 15 August 2021

⏱️ 83 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Blessed are your hosts, Theophiloi! It’s been a while, yes, but we’re back just in time for our mutual birthday, with a look at an apocryphal text that goes from zero to complete buck wild in the span of about one paragraph. Get ready for some real Bee Attitudes and join us in this episode as we find out how Joseph — the Old Testament one with the coat, not Jesus’s stepdad — met his very tall, very mean wife.

Topics of Discussion: Donald Duckin’ into an avuncular age, who’s the Scrooge/Georgia/Ryan/Taylor and who’s the Donald/Karen/Shane/Phoebe?, Apocrypha for Beginners by Brandon W. Hawk, fancasting for Aseneth, some good cat names, BDSM, a story about Balder the Brave.

Hymnal: “A Bee Without Its Sting” by the Go! Team, “Bad Romance” by Mad Organist (https://youtu.be/a9mgZqO4bgc)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Transcript

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0:00.7	You're listening to Apocopalus on the Greenlit Podcast Network.
0:04.3	Check out all of our shows at greenlitpodcasts.com.
0:09.1	You are blessed, Asineth, for the indescribable things of God have been revealed to you.
0:14.7	And blessed too are those who give their allegiance to the Lord God in penitence,
0:18.5	for they shall eat of this comb.
0:20.3	The bees of the paradise of delight have made this honey, and the angels of God eat it,
0:25.0	and no one who eats of it shall ever die.
0:28.8	Joseph Anassanath, chapter 16. Hello, I be without his pain, you'll be when I do my thing.
0:39.3	Hello, friends and neighbors, and welcome to Apocrypal.
0:55.3	It is the occasionally, irregularly updated podcast, where two non-believers read through the Bible,
1:00.9	but we try not to be jerks about it.
1:02.4	My name is Chris Sims, and with me as always is the other set of footprints, Benito Sereno.
1:07.7	Benito, how are you?
1:10.3	I'm pretty good, Chris. You know, it's, it's been, it's been, it's been, uh, it's been a while, but, um, much like out on the chipmunks, we've been chip wrecked.
1:22.6	That's good. You switched it up on me. I did. Hey, everyone. Good to, good to see you. Yeah, look, it's good. You switched it up on me. I did.
1:28.3	Hey, everyone.
1:29.2	Good to see you.
1:30.8	Yeah, look, it's been a, it's been a, it's, it's been a minute.
1:34.3	Yeah.
1:34.7	And that was not intentional.
1:37.0	Yeah.
1:37.6	But we had, well, well, let's be honest, I had some life stuff that precluded me from doing a lot of podcast recording
	...

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