94: Little Martha and the Small Vandellas (The Lives of St. Mary Magdalene and St. Wilgefortis)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 26 September 2021

⏱️ 73 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Work with me here, Theophiloi: It sure is late July 2021, and that means it’s time for us to celebrate the feast day of Jesus’s Second-Favorite Mary, depending on who you ask! We’re rolling through a hagiography of Mary Mags so dubious that even Jacobus de Voragine says part of it is definitely made up, and considering that dude’s wack standards, that’s saying something. Plus, a very special guest Saint who definitely exists because some history dude would not admit that he didn’t recognize a statue of Jesus.

Topics of Discussion: Chris’s move, Dave Seville’s truly reprehensible parenting, the nature of the word “bridge,” Just Tryin’ To Get Through in 5782, the nature of the word “Gruenies,” the etymology of Mary (fake), the etymology of Mary (real), antagonyms, the seven canonical hours, The Feet.

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Hymnal: “Proud Mary” by Tina Turner, “Never Gonna Give You Up” by Martijn Koetsier (https://www.youtube.com/c/Organ4everyone)

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to Apocopalus on the Greenlit Podcast Network.
0:03.6	Make sure to check out all of our shows at greenlitpodcast.com.
0:07.8	In her conversion, she was armed and rendered unconquerable by the armor of penance.
0:13.4	She armed herself the best possible way, with all the weapons of penance, because for every pleasure she had enjoyed, she found a way of emulating herself.
0:21.7	After her conversion, she was magnificent in the superabundance of grace, because where trespass abounded,
0:27.9	grace was super abundant.
0:31.1	The Golden Legend, the life of St. Mary Magdalene.
0:34.6	I lost a good job with the city, working for the man every night and day, and I never of St. Mary on the river.
1:10.0	This is the podcast where two non-believers read through Bible, but we try not to be jerks about it.
1:14.8	And in the immortal words of Diamond Dave, I heard you missed us.
1:19.9	We're back.
1:20.9	My name is Chris Sims.
1:21.9	With me, as always, the other set of footprints, Benito Serino.
1:24.5	Benito, how are you?
1:26.4	I'm pretty good, Chris. How about you? You've been up to anything lately?
1:32.3	A little bit. A little bit. I've moved across the country in a diagonal sort of direction,
1:40.1	a north-by-northwest sort of direction. If you're listening to this as they come out,
1:44.0	it's, it's been a while
1:47.0	i look i wasn't gonna i wasn't gonna say i wasn't gonna say it
1:53.0	are you sure because you can i no i mean i think everyone knows that about our style, et cetera. We know, we know. They know.
2:04.8	You know, I wish I had remembered to ask you this before we hit record because I can barely get through it without cussing.
2:12.2	And we don't swear on this show, if you're a new listener. We like to be, we like to be friendly to the grandmas who might want to listen.
	...

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