The following podcast is Soup's Fake. There are as many dimensions in this world as there are in a Jesse Eisenberg villain.

But we are gratefully sponsored by the millennial tyrants at Cards Against Humanity. Want to send a package to Arnie and Foon? Great? Do it!

I'm not saying the address again because I've said it 5,000 times and my mouth is bored. And now prepare to have your passport stamped as you cross the border into the Imagine Nation.

Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of Foon. I'm your host Arnie Neekamp. If you've never listened to the podcast before, this is the whole story. This is all you need to know. This is the part I say at the beginning of every episode.

About a year and a half ago, I felt through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King into the magical, fantastical land of Foon. Luckily, I'm still getting a Wi-Fi signal from the Burger King through that dimensional portal.

Which I used to upload a podcast I record every week here in the tavern, the Vermilion Minotaur, in the town of Hogsface, in the land of Foon. And I've joined as always by my buddies, my Goon Companions, Chant the King of the Badgers.

Hey, baby. How you doing, bud? Pretty good. How you doing? I'm doing okay. Not too bad. I do want to reveal something to you. Wow. I don't know if you're going to be happy. You're going to be sad. You're going to ask us to sit down, but you're always. I'm always. I actually asked one of the. I set you up on a date with one of the unwid mothers. I figured, you know, you have a wife and child at home that you can't take care of. You can't, you know, shower with love and adoration. So I got you a date with you. I'm going to ask you to sit down and say, I'm always. I'm always. I actually asked one of the. I set you up on a date with one of the unwid mothers. I figured, you know, you have a wife and child at home that you can't take care of. You can't, you know, shower with love and adoration. So

that's one of the unwid mothers. But I mean, I, but I thank you, but I welcome all. I'm so happy you're happy about it. Her name is Daphne. Daphne, yeah. She'll be. She'll be waiting for you tonight. I'm more of a Velma guy myself. What? I like Velma's more than Daphne's. Are you trying to say the name? Phelma and you're choking? I'm not a. Look, I'm a Velma guy. Not a film a guy. I'm a Louise guy. Oh, so you go both ways. Yes, Louise. Okay. Yes.

Wait, no, not Louise. Louise. What are you saying? I'm going to pass pass on that date. Oh, sorry. All right. You know what? Actually, speaking of my love life, what's going on with your love life?

I feel like we haven't talked about it in a long time. Nothing. Nothing drought.

Drought. Yeah. Like not even like, because usually I just assume that you're just having sex with a lot of badgers because we're always a badger. Will's run dry my friend.

And I am Yusador. Yusador. Yusador.

Fuck off. Like.

You're talking.

Oh, God.

You said all right.

Yusador. Yusador. Yusador. Yusador.

God.

Yusador. Yusador. Yusador. Yusador.

Look at Daphne crying at that. Yeah. Come on. Yusador.

I'm crying now. I'm here. Everywhere you send. Oh, I we I probably shouldn't have said all this stuff at the table next to the Unwadmothers.

She's going to run away.

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