Ooh, I like it already.

I'm Angela Duckworth.

I'm Stephen Dubner.

And you're listening to No Stupid Questions.

Today on the show, why do we want what we can't have?

It's like envy quickly followed by self-loathing for feeling envy, so yay, this is really fun. Also, can humans break from our tribalist instincts?

Let's acknowledge that it exists and beat the crap out of the people who are doing the wrong stuff.

Angie, we have a question here from one Philip Payne who has a hotmail account in the UK. I don't know

if that's relevant. We'll find out. He says, hi, NSQ, I think a lot. Some say too much about everyday

behaviors and why people do what they do. I would say we and Philip have that in common then. Yes, we do. Yeah,

you do not have a hotmail account in common, but you do have this curiosity in common.

That's true. Anyway, he writes, why do we want what we can't have? Is it just a way of expressing

autonomy, social signaling to our peers to show that we can achieve things, many don't,

or is there some human need to be a completist and collect, do, learn everything? Thanks, Phil Payne.

Is it true, Angie, as Phil writes, that most of us do want what we can't have?

Well, I was reading Lindsay Vaughn's new memoir. I don't even think it's published yet. So she sent it to me. If you don't ski, you may not know that she's, some would argue, one of the greatest skiers to ever live. Are you ski buddies? Do you race with her? You know, I don't ski. I don't want to ski, slightly afraid of heights.

You ever been on a sled? Don't want to be on a sled, have been on a sled. I just don't think

sliding down frictionless surfaces with no control is pleasurable, but apparently Lindsay Vaughn does,

and I guess for her she does have

control over it. So I read this memoir cover to cover in part because I really like her. I mean,

she's a paragon of grit. She's what I study. And then also, I literally have never read a memoir I

didn't like. Memoirs are like pizza. They just go from good to great, but there's nothing bad.

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