How do we not fall into that little whirlpool of terribleness?

I'm Angela Duckworth.

I'm Stephen Dubner.

And you're listening to No Stupid Questions.

Today on the show, how can you convince someone that they're wrong?

I, for a long time, have hated saying the words, I was wrong. Also, how can you ease the sting of rejection?

What is wrong with that mother bleeper?

So, Angie, I recently read an article in courts by Olivia Goldhill.

It was called To Tell Someone They're Wrong, First Tell Them They're Right.

And I thought of you, of course, since you're always right, and I'm usually wrong.

This article cited advice from Blaise Pascal, the 17th century French philosopher.

He wrote, when we wish to show another that he errs, we must notice from what side he views the matter, for on that side it is usually true. And we must admit that

truth to him, but reveal to him the side on which it is false. He is satisfied with that,

for he sees that he was not mistaken and that he only

failed to see all sides. And so, Angie, Pascal argues that this would essentially pave the

way for an admission of at least partial wrong thinking. Now, to me, this sounds very sensible, theoretically effective. I want to know

from you, has it been tried? Does it work? Is this the way we should all be operating?

Well, before we get to Pascal and the modern science of this, you've read Dale Carnegie. You know that I'm a secret superfan of

Dale Carnegie, right? You're not a secret super fan. You're a superfan. There's nothing secret about that.

I am a super fan in How to Win Friends and Influence People. I remember, he said this and I was like, yes.

And that is, if you're trying to convince somebody of your point of

view, you first want to give your opponent the chance to fully describe their opinion. You want to

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