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Transcript

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0:00.0	Attention, the Earth audience. The following podcast is nothing to take seriously. It's
0:09.1	simply a group of bored humans playing pretend. But it is part of the crotch weasel,
0:14.0	it would rather the earwolf network. And against all reason it continues to be sponsored
0:18.6	by Cards Against Humanity. Send your care packages to Cards Against Humanity
0:23.5	on 917 North Elston, Chicago, Illinois, 60642, care of Arnie Neacamp, Vermillion Minotaur,
0:30.5	town of Hogsface, land of Foon. And the good people at Cards Against Humanity will drive
0:35.4	your package over to the Burger King and shove it through the dimensional portal for Arnie
0:39.9	Chountain Usador to enjoy. And now, who wants some made up scenarios?
0:53.5	Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of Foon. I'm your host
1:11.1	Arnie Neacamp. If you've never listened to the podcast before, this is what's going
1:13.9	on. A little over a year and some stuff ago I fell through a dimensional portal behind
1:19.7	a Burger King into the magical, fantastical land of Foon. Luckily I still get a slight
1:24.3	Wi-Fi signal, I think through the dimensional portal from the Burger King, and I use that
1:29.3	to record a podcast that I host every week here in the Tavern, the Vermillion Minotaur, in
1:34.2	the town of Hogsface, in the land of Foon. And I'm joined as always by my dear, dear friends.
1:40.9	Hi, I am Usador. Wizard of the 12th Rail of Muffin's, Master of Light and Shadow.
1:49.6	Maybe later, magical lights, devour of chaos, champion of the Great Halls of Turokis,
1:56.8	the elves know me as Fien-Yalek. The dwarves know me as Zodyn who extinguishes, and I
2:03.3	have known in the North East. Let's get Smyrnius, my star. Oh, there may be other secret
2:09.8	names you do not know yet. Oh, but Arnold, despite all my great powers, despite my magical
2:17.3	lights, my untold secret gifts, I can do nothing for our other co-hosts.
2:24.7	Oh, slippery. I know. I know. Things are looking a little bleak. We're also joined as always
	...

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