Welcome to UnFuck Your Brain. The only podcast that teaches you how to use psychology, feminism, and coaching to rewire your brain

and get what you want in life.

And now here's your host.

Harvard Law School grad, Feminist Rockstar, and Master Coach,

Kara Loyenthyle.

Hello my chickens, it is time for a listener Q&A. I keep thinking we're going to wrap these up and then I just keep getting more great questions. So here we go. All right, hi Kara, how would you recommend using

thought work to address things from your past, specifically things we label

as regrets? How do you deal with old wounds? For example, you lost a friendship with someone you wish you wouldn't have.

Your thoughts and those actions and words at the time caused a crumbling in a friendship that you now wish you could change the outcome of, but can't go back in time to do so.

I'm assuming that regret is just another thought in our minds, but I was curious of your take on the situation.

Okay, so regret is an emotion, I think, right, it's a feeling in our bodies.

I think it's like a, you nuanced diversion of sadness probably I think I've talked

about this on the podcast before but you know anthropologically one of the theories is

that we you know we're basically five major emotions

that you know all are almost all humans all over the world share but of course in

English we have you know a hundred thousand words for different kinds of emotions so I kind of

of always think of you know anything beyond like happy sad angry ashamed you know

laughter or joyful like depending on the theory, but like anything

more nuanced than that I just think of as being like a derivative form of it or

like a, like in a family tree it branches out from under it.

So I think regret is an emotion,

and I think that it is basically sadness,

...