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Regular Features

614: Quiet Little Trash Boy

Regular Features

Regular Features

Comedy

4.9546 Ratings

🗓️ 9 February 2026

⏱️ 45 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Hello this is the news. In the past hour United Nations has announced that we have flopped through a temporal squirmhole into the rotten Time Dimension, and that we had better get used to living under the autocratic regime of supreme leader Doctor Time and his dope calendars. In this episode of the podcast, Steve dives into the good doctor's rude past, Gav tests our song intro knowledge, and Joe meets the world's foremost expert in being oh so freakin' quiet. Let's dance. Put on your red shoes and select "dance" from the drop-down menu. "Mesmerising Galaxy", "Burn the World Waltz" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Transcript

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0:00.0

Regular regular, regular, regular features.

0:01.9

A regular regular, regular features.

0:04.0

A regular regular features.

0:07.5

Hello and welcome to regular features, the podcast that is exactly the same, every single week.

0:13.0

And like every single week, my name is Gab Miffey.

0:15.7

And like every single week, his name is Joe Scrabbles.

0:18.2

Hi.

0:18.8

And his name, like every week, is Steve Hoganty. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hey. Hey. How are you doing? How you doing? Little guys? You're freaking little guys doing your freaky little things. It's okay now. We're old. We can be freaky little guys. It's okay. It's okay. We're old freaky little guys. This is cool, man. It's cool. It's cool. I'm enjoying aging into a freaky little guy. Me too. I think that's the thing. People do say it's like when you start going to know, I literally do not give a fuck. Yeah. Sorry, Gavin. I would know before I was just acting like I didn't give a fuck. But actually, I gave several fuckers. Whereas now, I honestly, like the other day, someone was like, oh, we've just organized this thing, do you want to come? I just said, no. And I said, why? It was like, I just don't want to go. You can't make me go. I just simply do not want to do that.

1:12.5

For you, that's such a positive state of mind.

1:16.1

For everyone else, this is the era in which Gav actually doesn't give a fuck and

1:21.0

anything could happen.

1:24.4

But the thing is that the person that was messaging me was just like, oh, well, if that, if that date doesn't, nothing to do with the date.

1:31.0

They're like, if that date doesn't work for you. Or if you, if you want to do something, if you want, what about, what about it? It's nothing to do with the date and it's nothing to do with the activity. The date works. Oh, boy, does the date work. Yeah. The day couldn't be more perfect. I'm going to be twiddling my thumbs that day. They're like, why, have you got stuff on? No, that's the point. I don't have anything on. That's the genius of it. Yeah. And they're like, well, we can move it. Don't move it. Don't move it at all. Sitting pretty right there on that date, isn't it? Steve, I think you and Reese are very good at her. Saying no to things. No, not saying no to things, but I think like, like, we went out a couple of Fridays ago to watch the traitors live, not like, but like we went to watch the traitors at a pub. And I think like, we all could have had a pint, but we kind of all just went, do you want to have a pint? We're like, nah. And it was like, no one was like, oh my God, I can't believe you just. It was just like, no, we were like, oh, let's, we all go home. We were like, yeah, that's great. Let's go home. there are the times where we want to get more fucked up so it's fine I'm enjoying this new era good Good. It's healthy. It's wise. It's wisdom.

2:36.7

Yeah. It's boys who know their limits. Yeah.

2:40.2

Know when to cut loose and when to take up the slack and take out the trash.

2:48.4

Boys who know how to take out the trash is a 70s exploitation film

2:53.1

I want to watch.

2:55.6

I really want to do a spin-off podcast at one point

2:58.9

because we struggle to do one episode of this a week

3:01.8

but I really would still like us to do a spin-off anyway

3:04.4

and I think boys who know how to take out the trash

3:07.2

What is it? Just know how to take out the trash.

...

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