I don't know what happened but we were driving down the highway we're on

cruise control we were vibing and all the sudden we took an exit and I didn't mean to

take this exit but now I don't know how to get back to the highway so we're

just traveling along this depressive route and I'm trying to find the detour. I'm trying to find a place to turn around and every time I turn around it's like it just loops right back to depression, right? But depression is not me. I am not depression. Right now my brain has more depressive tendencies,

my brain has more depressive thoughts, my brain feels depressed, it's offering thoughts that don't feel good,

but I am not depressed. Oh, willa, willa, welcome back to the in source podcast. My name Ashley I'm coming to you smack dab in the

middle or I don't know if I'm in the middle or near the end or still towards the

beginning of a

beginning of a depressive episode. Today, because the only thing that I know how to do with absolute certainty is be me.

Everything else I know I can fail up but being me I can do and so I'm in the

middle of experiencing depression right now and so I'm going to share that with you

about what I've been doing to manage through it. Now if you've been following me

for any length of time.

You've probably heard me talk about depression before.

You've probably heard me reference that I tend to have a depressed brain.

I have depression, it definitely doesn't have me, but it started about, I mean I can

remember feeling just really blue and insecure for a lot of my adulthood but the really depressive

thoughts the suicidal thoughts and this is trigger warning I don't really know

how to how to say that. You know people say trigger warnings and I'm like I don't know you

just got to protect your peace so if this is not accessible to you today if if talking about depression is not something not

something that your brain needs, please protect your brain and come back next week

and find a different episode or come back to this one

...