Today we're pleased to share with you an audio essay written and read by Brian Rosner entitled

Five Reasons You Did Not and Cannot Reinvent Yourself.

Brian is the author of How to Find Yourself, Why Looking Inward is Not the Answer from Crosswhite.

Five Reasons You Did Not and Cannot from Crosswhite. Five reasons you did not and cannot reinvent yourself. Written and read by Brian Rosner.

The Social Animal.

When it comes to knowing yourself, social psychologists speak of the looking glass self, a term coined back in 1902.

It refers to our tendency to understand ourselves by perceiving what others make of us.

In other words, the self is the result of learning to see ourselves as others see us. The great Scottish poet Robert Burns

is credited with saying, oh, would some power the gift give us to see ourselves as others see us?

Apparently, each of us has that power, for seeing ourselves as others see us is the experience of every human

being. Human beings are social animals. A growing body of research, some parts surprising,

some parts amusing, indicates the extent to which we are profoundly relational creatures

and pushes against any notion that anyone is a

self-made self. I'll make five general points in connection with this fact, drawn from David

Brooks's excellent work, each one striking at the heart of expressive individualism.

The following five points are my own synthesis of the relevant studies.

You were largely formed by your parents.

Your thoughts are not entirely your own.

Your mind is not exclusively your own.

Your behaviour is shaped by the company you keep. You don't know yourself that well.

Number one, you were largely formed by your parents. Parents effectively pass onto their

children an identity which the child then accepts, revises or rejects in adolescence.

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