#496 - Cloud 7, 40 Guffs and Elements of Edmonds

Elis James and John Robins

BBC

Comedy

4.8 • 6K Ratings

🗓️ 9 December 2025

⏱️ 80 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What does an already packed show need to make it feel complete? That’s right, it’s an 8 minute intro (or just under a 5th of an Edinburgh show...) and an 8 minute Noel Edmonds apologia. This show is nothing if not disciplined.

Once we’re all intro’ed and up-to-date on the elements of Edmonds, it’s content content content. John does some winning and losing, Elis does some Cymru Connecting, and everyone plays a great Made Up Game that has John declaring God is real.

Send in your knick-knacks to [email protected] or WhatsApp the show on 07974 293 022.

Transcript

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0:00.0	BBC Sounds, Music, Radio, podcasts.
0:07.3	Welcome to the Wayne Rooney show.
0:09.3	Twice a week, Wayne Rooney, Kayeard and me, Kelly Somers,
0:12.4	break down the biggest stories in the Premier League and beyond.
0:15.5	Coming to the Premier League, he's shown one called Play, he isn't.
0:18.2	He's been probably the sound of the season.
0:19.6	Plus, we'll hear the funniest and most outrageous stories from Wayne's career.
0:23.7	I had two seasons when I played as the number nine and scored 34 goals in both the seasons.
0:28.1	But I was bored.
0:30.3	Wayne Rooney Show.
0:31.5	It's what everybody's talking about.
0:33.8	Watch an eye player, listen on sounds.
0:55.7	Thank you. Watch an eye player, listen on Towns. Hello everyone.
0:59.2	The BBC is deep into their search for a new Director General,
1:01.8	and after a round of interviews from the corporate world,
1:04.4	it was time to hold open interviews from within,
1:08.6	in the hope that the BBC could find leadership from in-house talent.
1:13.2	Following a petition from the general public and an appeal from His Majesty the King,
1:17.6	I headed for Broadcasting House, armed with my vision for a better BBC.
1:22.5	Despite arriving as the front doors opened, it was clear from the waiting room outside the chairman's office that many had camped out overnight to be first in line.
1:28.0	Adrian Charles was still fast asleep in his Super Ted sleeping bag.
1:32.4	A nagger made the shush sign as I stepped over him.
	...

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