473. Going Back to the Person Who Ghosted Me, Sister in Law Drama, and Wanting Out of a “Good” Relationship - Head Noise

Do You F*cking Mind?

Alexis Fernandez-Preiksa - Neuroscientist and Mindset Coach

Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.9 • 914 Ratings

🗓️ 12 February 2026

⏱️ 31 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this Head Noise episode, we’re unpacking three very different dilemmas that all come down to trust, discomfort, and self-honesty.

We talk about:

What to do when you get back with someone who previously ghosted you, and the trust issues won’t go away
How to build a relationship with your sister-in-law when you fundamentally don’t see eye to eye
Why you might want to leave a “lovely” boyfriend, and how to know if you’re making a mistake or finally listening to yourself

This episode covers:

Rebuilding trust after being ghosted (and whether it’s actually possible)

Why good on paper doesn’t always mean right for you
Fear of regret vs fear of staying stuck
Choosing peace over potential

If you’ve ever stayed because you were scared to hurt someone, gone back to someone who hurt you, or felt guilty for wanting something different, this one will hit.

As always, Head Noise is about cutting through the emotional fog and helping you make decisions that align with your self-respect.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Hello, beautiful beans and welcome to the podcast episode of today. So this is a head noise episode. Finally, I am back with the voice note head noise episodes. I have three that we're going to get to today.
0:23.6	Life update. I'm just trying to think I'm on the cusp, guys, the fucking cusp of handing in
0:29.1	the initial draft for my book. It has been a journey, one that has seen many versions of me
0:37.0	kind of, I literally started writing this book.
0:39.6	I want to say like two months before the babies were born.
0:43.1	And I had like this wave of kind of inspiration and energy to write that book for maybe the first
0:50.5	couple of weeks.
0:51.9	Then in the lead up to the babies being born, I was so flat even mentally. I was just, my body was drained from every possible resource. And then obviously once the babies were born, and the very, very early stages I was able to do a bit of writing because they would just sleep all the time. And then there was a big chunk of time where I had not touched the book. Anyway, we're back into a good rhythm now
1:12.3	and the draft is due on Monday. So you're listening to this Friday, so it's due Monday. So you would
1:18.3	imagine me just going through, I've written most of it, but I've got like a few chapters left and
1:22.8	then of course going over it and revising it and then handing it over to my publisher. She's a legend though,
1:28.0	so we're going to work through that draft together, but just getting that initial draft
1:32.1	handed in will feel like such a huge accomplishment bigger than all the other, well, the three
1:36.9	other books I've written because I've been doing it with the twins on board as well. So if I can
1:41.7	get this done, I feel like I can pretty much take over the world at this point. Okay. Let's get straight into the, um, the fucking listener questions.
1:52.8	Um, and some of you guys have great. Actually, all three of you have great titles. Come at me
2:00.1	thick and fast with the, with the great titles because I do love
2:03.4	reading them out. So the first one is how to learn to trust someone again.
2:08.8	Good at Alexis. Continuing to love the podcast. I was fortunate to get on quite a few months back about
2:15.4	a girl who just unfortunately emotionally abandoned me.
2:20.0	I was definitely stuck in a state of limerance, but also I was still in love with her,
2:24.4	but also the idea of her.
	...

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