473. Coaching Hotline: What If I'm Truly Ugly & Stupid - & Are Vibrations Real?
UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone
Kara Loewentheil
4.6 • 5.6K Ratings
🗓️ 10 March 2026
⏱️ 16 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Does your brain love to tell you you're ugly, incapable, or untalented? What if it's right? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into a listener’s question about those persistent negative thoughts that tell us we’re not good enough. You’ll discover why it doesn't actually matter if they are objectively true or not, and why intentionally deciding how you think about yourself does.
I also answer a question about the concept of vibrations and energy, where a listener is struggling to understand how thought work connects with things like chemistry, energy healing, and even Reiki. Tune in to learn how to approach these concepts with clarity, and why your beliefs about them are just as powerful as any physical sensation.
Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline
Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/473
Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/
Mentioned in this episode:
The Future Coach Podcast is Here!
The Future Coach: How to Succeed as a Life Coach Today, Tomorrow, and Beyond is finally here. Every other week, you'll hear practical advice about becoming a coach, improving your coaching skills, and antidotes to the most common concerns, questions, and brain drama that come up with this work, whether you're just starting out or you're years into your career. If you want to find out more, you can find it anywhere you listen to podcasts and hit that follow button.
The Future Coach Podcast is Here!
The Future Coach: How to Succeed as a Life Coach Today, Tomorrow, and Beyond is finally here. Every other week, you'll hear practical advice about becoming a coach, improving your coaching skills, and antidotes to the most common concerns, questions, and brain drama that come up with this work, whether you're just starting out or you're years into your career. If you want to find out more, you can find it anywhere you listen to podcasts and hit that follow button.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to unfuck your brain. I'm your host Kara Lowentile, master-certified coach, and founder of the School of New Feminist Thought. I'm here to help you turn down your anxiety, turn up your confidence, and create a life on your own terms, one that you're truly excited to live. |
| 0:21.3 | Let's go. |
| 0:24.8 | Welcome to this week's coaching hotline episode where I answer real questions from real listeners |
| 0:31.2 | and coach you from afar. |
| 0:33.6 | If you want to submit your question for consideration, go to unfuck your brain.com forward slash |
| 0:39.5 | coaching hotline, all one word, or text your email to plus one 347-997-1784. And when you get |
| 0:48.7 | prompted for the code word, it's coaching hotline, all one word. Let's get into this week's questions. |
| 0:55.5 | Here is your first question, which I think a lot of you are going to identify with. |
| 1:00.2 | Hi, Kara, I've been listening to your podcast obsessively, but one thing keeps popping up. |
| 1:05.0 | My lizard brain interferes with my thought work almost every single time I attempt to buckle down and address my negative self-talk, |
| 1:12.5 | repeating on loop this heinous idea that no matter how much I dedicate myself to thought work, |
| 1:17.4 | objectivity still dictates that I'm ugly, stupid, uninteresting, untalented, and incapable. |
| 1:23.2 | My lizard brain feeds me this idea that thought work is merely an attempt to fight back |
| 1:27.0 | against the objective, quantifiable, Darwinian truth, that some people are simply better than others, that thought work is simply a pathetic, self-soothing mechanism to make yourself feel better, all while avoiding this objective reality. How can I address this insidious thought and its associated feelings? So here's what I think is so fascinating about this, right? |
| 1:47.4 | Ugly, stupid, uninteresting, and talented and incapable. |
| 1:51.1 | Those are all words that humans have made up |
| 1:54.9 | that have different definitions across different cultures |
| 1:58.7 | or even in the same culture across different people. |
| 2:02.1 | What is considered ugly today used to be considered beautiful and vice versa. The kind of |
| 2:07.9 | intelligence that is considered to matter has changed over time. Talent. Van Gogh, I think, |
| 2:13.8 | only sold one painting when he was alive. Everybody thought he was a hack. Now we think he's a genius. |
| 2:19.4 | These thoughts are so subjective. These are all obviously words that only humans made up. |
... |
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