This is what I think it'd be like to go out to dinner with Timothy Shalame.

He shows up 20 minutes late. I asked him where he was. He says he was mesmerized by a street performer.

I asked him if he paid him. He says, no, that would be insulting to his craft. I asked him if he wants anything to drink. He says, probably a Japanese whiskey. Then proceeds to order a French 75 in French. French. I ask him how Kylie is. He says, oh, my lady's so lovely. Then he asked me if I've had any

innovative hot sauces lately. I say, I don't understand the is. He says, oh, my lady's so lovely. Then he asked me if I've had any

innovative hot sauces lately. I say, I don't understand the question. He says he thinks he can be a disruptor in that space and then beatboxes for a little bit. He stops dead in his tracks and says, whoa, I'm having the worst day I'll view of my life. The night ends abruptly when he tells me he can take any criticism. So I say, okay, I didn't really like Wonka that much. He says,

I'm not understanding it as a reflection of our culture and it's larger place in the tells me he can take any criticism. So I say, okay, I didn't really like Wonka that much.

He says, I'm not understanding it as a reflection of our culture and it's larger place in the Wonka universe.

TVTL.

I don't know what it is, but as soon as you bring some carbs or some bread into the room, especially if they like hot out the oven and buttery, I just turn into a monster.

You have never seen somebody fuck up a piece of garlic bread until you've seen me fuck up a piece of garlic bread.

You will lose any bit of respect you ever have for me.

I hear the words you're saying, and I believe you believe it's important.

Laughter, a sure sign of a good time.

No, definitely.

Yeah.

Literally no.

Yeah.

Yeah. No. For sure. No. Between your no- Yeah. Yeah.

No.

For sure.

No.

Between your no nonsense approach and my, the regular amount of nonsense approach, we make a pretty good team.

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