442. Self Belief v Self Esteem (And Which One Wins) (Confidence Compass Skill 3)

UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

Kara Loewentheil

Health & Fitness, Philosophy, Education, Society & Culture, Mental Health, Self-improvement

4.6 • 5.5K Ratings

🗓️ 20 November 2025

⏱️ 20 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We hear a lot about self esteem these days. Why it matters, how to get more of it, and what it means when you feel like you do not have enough. Most people think that improving their self esteem will automatically make them more confident, but to create real and lasting confidence, they are missing something essential: self belief.

In this episode, I am breaking down the difference between the two and explaining why self belief is the skill that actually moves your life forward. You will also learn why your brain resists confidence in the first place and how to work through the fears that keep you playing small.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/442

Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Join me to for Create More Confidence: A Pop-Up Coaching Program on December 8-10, 2025 here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/confident

Mentioned in this episode:

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Transcript

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0:00.0	We hear a lot about self-esteem these days, why it's important, how to get more of it,
0:04.9	what happens when you don't have it? But have you ever heard of self-belief? Self-belief is actually
0:10.8	more important than self-esteem. Today I'm going to explain the crucial difference between
0:15.1	these two concepts and how you can use self-belief to propel you forward in your life.
0:20.9	Welcome to unfuck your brain.
0:23.2	I'm your host Kara Lowenthal, master-certified coach, and founder of the School of New
0:28.3	Feminist Thub.
0:29.7	I'm here to help you turn down your anxiety, turn up your confidence, and create a life
0:35.0	on your own terms, one that you're truly excited to live. Let's go.
0:42.5	So yesterday I was coaching a client in the Feminist Self-Help Society, and side note, by the way,
0:48.6	because some of you are messaging us about it. We're getting a lot of emails and DMs, wanting to know
0:53.2	when the society will open for new
0:54.8	members again. And I don't have a date for that because we're working really hard on an exciting
0:59.4	new program that we're going to be launching in December. And this is going to be like a smaller
1:04.3	group program, kind of akin to what I used to do when I first started out coaching, but with like all
1:09.5	new teaching. So I'm super excited about it. And don't worry, you will all be hearing about it as soon as we're ready to share more, but good things are coming. So that answers the question. If you've been emailing or DMing us, asking about the society, like keep an eye out, keep an ear out. Something new is coming. Okay, so back to business. I was coaching my client in the society
1:28.3	yesterday, and she was experiencing this problem where she was trying to improve something in her life,
1:33.1	and she followed some advice she got about solving it, and the problem got worse. Now, from the
1:39.0	outside, it might seem clear what to do, right? Just stop doing the thing that's making it worse.
1:43.5	Like, go back to what you were doing before, because at least you'll get back to your baseline, right? Just stop doing the thing that's making it worse. Like, go back to what you were
1:44.6	doing before, because at least you'll get back to your baseline, right? And then you could try to
1:48.4	improve it a different way. But she was all up in her head about it, believing that the person
	...

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