#398: Stop Saying Your Ex RUINED Your Life (They're Not That Important)
Breakup Boost: Advice to Get Over Heartbreak
Trina Leckie
4.8 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 5 November 2025
⏱️ 9 minutes
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Summary
You keep saying your ex ruined your life - but you've got to stop giving them so much power. I get it... after a breakup, you're hurt, you're angry, you're replaying everything in your head… but calling your life "ruined" doesn't just flatter them - it makes it sound like you don't even have an identity without them. Come on now.... it's time to flip this script!
LISTEN NOW.
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(1) ORDER EMAIL or PHONE coaching at breakupBOOST.com
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to Breakup Boost, honest and logical advice with the sprinkle of bluntness. |
| 0:06.6 | Trina keeps it real. She'll help you navigate the craziness of the modern dating world. |
| 0:11.0 | Stop obsessing over your ex and finally close the door on half-ass relationships. |
| 0:15.4 | This girl's got your back. Here's Trina. |
| 0:20.0 | Hi guys. I'm here to tell you that while it's common to say that your ex ruined your life |
| 0:25.7 | after a breakup when your emotions are all over the place, I urge you to stop because it sounds |
| 0:31.1 | like you are so defeated that you have no life without this person. And hello, if it came to |
| 0:36.9 | this, please don't give them that much power. |
| 0:40.1 | Oh, hell to the no. So what's happening then is they're off living their life and you're crying in |
| 0:46.1 | bed saying that they ruined yours? Stop flattering them. Oh my God, they're not that important. |
| 0:54.7 | Sure things didn't go how you hoped and sure things hadn't gone how you were promised. |
| 0:59.7 | But unless your ex literally framed you for a crime and you ended up in prison or whatever, |
| 1:05.2 | eating those powdered mashed potatoes and God knows what kind of meatloaf, |
| 1:09.8 | your life is not ruined. Your life is not ruined. It is |
| 1:14.3 | rerouted. And this is exactly why people you are in a romantic relationship with should be seen as |
| 1:21.6 | additions to your life. Nobody should ever become your whole entire life where you feel as though you cannot exist without them |
| 1:29.6 | and yes even if you have kids even if you're married even if you share a home and this is because |
| 1:37.3 | there are no guarantees in any of this there are no guarantees no one knows what may happen from one day to the next, let alone in several |
| 1:46.3 | years. Every relationship you enter into is essentially a gamble. It's like going to Vegas. |
| 1:53.0 | Another good reason to not go overboard calling this person you're forever in all that jazz that |
| 1:58.3 | comes with it. This is why people say you have to live in the present. |
| 2:03.3 | Living in the future leads you to these expectations that don't always surface, |
... |
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