#386: The Revenge Robber (@MadFlavor)

Ari Shaffir's Skeptic Tank

Ari Shaffir

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4.6 • 6.7K Ratings

🗓️ 18 May 2020

⏱️ 189 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Joey Diaz is one of my all time stealing heroes. He is an inspiration to shoplifters everywhere. Even though he's semi-retired since having a child, his legend lives on. This episode is all about stealing. From one of the former greats to a current title contender. Please steal this episode.

This episode is brought to you by sheathunderwear.com. Use promo code "Ari" to get 20% off your first order.

The Music

The Smiths - Shoplifters of the World Unite

Temple of the Dog - Hunger Strike

Max Romeo - Stealing in the Name of Jah

Etta James - Steal Away

Transcript

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0:00.0	And then I figured out that if I took piss test but ruined the test they couldn't fucking test me
0:06.6	So I would hide shit in my dick like Drainow and you know pool clean and
0:12.4	And you know I'm on second size I got that judic so I would pull the skin back
0:18.0	Chemicals would fall out of my dick until the piss test and they knew I was breaking the machine
0:30.0	Shove the list of the ball handed over
0:37.0	Handed over
0:46.0	Hello everybody welcome to our first gift. Thank you. I'm our ship here
0:52.4	Today's podcast is about stealing just so you know before I do that
0:55.8	I'm going to tell you about a fucking product that is for online only so you can't steal so yeah, then they go they go
1:03.6	They're not much use goes so so first of all I have joy deas on today
1:07.6	Just you know this is our ship is skeptic tank. Let's say that
1:11.7	Joy deas our old buddy is fucking on again, and we're just gonna talk about fucking stealing you guys
1:16.1	The stimulus situation is is the economy. It's just it's fucking rough and I know a lot of people out of work
1:21.2	So what I want you to do is I want you to start thinking about ways
1:25.8	That you can fucking lower costs
1:29.7	By taking things for free from stores
1:33.7	Obviously you got to have your own clover of ethics about it and all this is just a fucking justification for taking free shit
1:38.2	So but you got to think what can I get away with and recover that in today's episode?
1:42.5	How do you steal what were his best methods?
1:47.0	It's the e true Hollywood story of a fucking thief
1:51.7	From the marbles of decades
1:55.9	Yeah, joy deas we just talked about fucking stealing a shoplifting. I do not remember him doing so much shit
	...

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