352 The Kids Who Can’t Be Told What to Do: PDA & Low-Demand Parenting (with Casey Ehrlich)
I Have ADHD Podcast
Kristen Carder
4.8 • 2.8K Ratings
🗓️ 18 November 2025
⏱️ 77 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What if your child’s resistance, meltdowns, or refusal to do “simple” things isn’t defiance—but a nervous system response?
In this conversation, Kristen talks with Casey Ehrlich, founder of At Peace Parents and one of the leading voices on Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). Casey is a researcher, parent coach, and mom of two PDA kids who helps families understand the intersection of ADHD, autism, and PDA through a lens of compassion and nervous system science.
Together, they explore what PDA really is, why it shows up so often in ADHD families, and how traditional parenting strategies often backfire when a child’s need for autonomy is being misunderstood as opposition.
Follow Casey Ehrlich on Instagram and be sure to check out At Peace Parents
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the I Have ADHD podcast, where it's all about education, encouragement, and coaching for adults with ADHD. |
| 0:13.9 | I'm your host, Kristen Carter, and I have ADHD. Let's chat about the frustrations, humor, |
| 0:20.0 | and challenges of adulting, relationships, |
| 0:22.8 | working, and achieving with this neurodevelopmental disorder. |
| 0:26.6 | I'll help you understand your unique brain, unlock your potential, and move from point A to |
| 0:32.4 | point B. |
| 0:33.8 | Hey, what's up? |
| 0:34.7 | This is Kristen Carter, and you've tuned into the I Have ADHD podcast. I am |
| 0:39.2 | medicated, caffeinated, regulated, and so ready to roll. I am bursting at the seams excited for |
| 0:47.4 | our guests today. This topic is the most requested topic that I have had over and over and over |
| 0:53.9 | in the last year, |
| 0:54.8 | and we are talking today about pathological demand avoidance. What we're going to be talking, |
| 1:01.0 | this is going to be two episodes in a row, so like buckle up, get cozy, get ready. |
| 1:06.7 | We're going to be talking about what does PDA look like in our kids and how can we help |
| 1:12.0 | pathologically demand avoidant kids thrive. |
| 1:15.4 | And then in the next episode next week, we're going to talk about what does it look like |
| 1:19.7 | in adults and am I pathologically demand avoidant? |
| 1:23.4 | We're all going to find out together. |
| 1:25.3 | I am so excited today with me. I'm going to read her bio here |
| 1:28.8 | is Casey Ehrlich PhD. She is the leading researcher on PDA in the United States, a mother of two |
| 1:35.6 | PDA children, and the founder and CEO of at peace parents, which you should all go follow on |
| 1:41.3 | Instagram right this second. Following her account, changed my life, and changed |
... |
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