You know what I just did?

I just walked out that door, saw a couple of detectives,

and was about to badmouth you behind your back.

But I stopped myself because my pops taught me

that a man who talks behind somebody's back

is a coward.

I really appreciate that. Good!

because I'm going to tell you directly to your face.

Oh, no. I don't like you. I think you're a fake cop.

The sound of your pee hit in the urinal? It sounds feminine.

Okay. If we were in the wild, I it sounds feminine. Okay.

If we were in the wild, I would attack you.

Even if you weren't in my food chain, I would go out of my way to attack you.

If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and

freaking eat you.

And then I'd kiss your tuna girlfriend.

Okay, first off, a lion swimming in the ocean?

Lions don't even like water.

If you placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source,

that makes sense.

But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot waves?

I'm assuming it's off the coast of South Africa.

...