The following is an archived podcast presented by the Branson and Hudson Foundation for Podcast Recovery, a Charles Austin company.

It is the first and only episode of the podcast.

Welcome to episode one.

What's up, real life gamers, speed runners, ethereal beings, living hacks, Tom Bombadil types to our glitchy little corner of the globe.

Of course, I am talking about RDQ, aka reality, done, quick.

And I hope you came here today, ready to see some amazing speed runs

showcasing some of the fastest and most talented reality speedrunners in the game today.

Tom Hanks fan, Sonic the Bedhog, and Sideways Good Movie

just showed us an amazing minute, 13 second jury giving the death penalty speed run.

And we got plenty more coming up in the next hour.

I'll be your host today, Fun Player 1, joined by a full panel of my speed running brethren.

First up, my co-host, Cemeteryemetery Scon, tell the crowd a little bit about

yourself. Oh, absolutely fun. I am absolutely happy to be here in Vancouver, beautiful Canada.

I cannot tell you how exciting this event is. Every single year we come together. We see the best people

in the entire galaxy, in the entire universe, show us what they've got.

And I, you know, I've been around the block a few times.

This isn't my first rodeo.

You know, a lot of people knew I speed ran Disney within two hours back in 2010.

I also collected every single Star Wars episode one Pepsi can.

I am the only runner in history who is not too scared to speed run the women's underwear section at Target.

And I also have another notch of my belt.

I speed ran purgatory in just three days.

...