319: Don’t Touch the Spaghetti: Floor-Food Rules, Streamer Drama & Bear vs. Wolf | DIYS
Dam Internet, You Scary!
Patrick Cloud, Tahir Moore
4.9 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 11 September 2025
⏱️ 53 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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If you dropped it… would you still eat it? Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud kick off with the ultimate floor-food debate, spin it into a “Don’t Touch the Spaghetti” improv bit that escalates hilariously, then dive into streamer controversies, IRL etiquette, security vs. clout, and a wild bear-vs-wolf standoff. Plus: two sponsor offers inside.
Highlights: five-second-rule logic, Gordon Ramsay hypotheticals, Monica Lewinsky/media culture, school safety in the social-media era, stream-sniping, when security should step in, “realest” rappers, Chicago myths vs. reality, and an animal-kingdom face-off. New DIYS every week—pull up!
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00:00 – Cold Open: Trash juice & floor-food rules
01:24 – The “Don’t Touch the Spaghetti” game setup
03:09 – Uber driver, repast spaghetti & ridiculous escalation
05:10 – Are we doing this right now? How the bit works
06:01 – What would you eat out of the trash (top layer only)?
07:28 – Fruit vs. veggies: rinse, slice, or pass
10:11 – Reality-show kitchen disaster: serving… trash spaghetti?
11:26 – “Yes, and”: building the world of the bit
12:57 – Accidentally killing Gordon Ramsay?! Career pivot talk
15:22 – Monica Lewinsky, presidents & power + media culture
20:08 – AD: BlueChew (Offer)
21:31 – Back to the dress, late-90s context, school drills
25:09 – WorldStar to TikTok: why fights aren’t worth it
27:30 – Streamer incident breakdown & consequences
31:00 – Streaming pitfalls: who’s around you matters
35:00 – IRL streaming, stream-sniping & safety
36:02 – AD: BetterHelp (Offer)
38:59 – Security vs. clout: when to let pros handle it
40:09 – DaBaby incidents & “realest rapper” debate
42:16 – King Von discussion & Chicago realities
44:13 – Chicago is beautiful (travel notes & downtown rule)
47:00 – 6'8" car-review friend & insane life stories
49:20 – Animal Planet logic: size really matters
51:21 – Bear vs. massive wolf: hour-long standoff
52:23 – Plugs: tours, projects & Planet Sandwich live
52:57 – Outro: Thanks, Scary Squad!
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | There's something about wet food that makes it like, I feel like, like, for instance, |
| 0:07.5 | trash juice. |
| 0:09.2 | You know, trash is already nasty, but if you pour a water bottle and then pour the trash juice out, |
| 0:15.1 | that to me is so much worse than the physical trash. |
| 0:18.3 | Yeah. |
| 0:19.9 | And I think about that every time I'm about to throw a cup away, |
| 0:23.0 | like I will go over to the soda fountain dispenser and pour there instead of doing it. |
| 0:29.8 | Because I just think about the person that's got to take that out. |
| 0:31.8 | And it's leaking. |
| 0:32.9 | Yeah, imagine if you work the double and you got to take the trash out because somebody didn't show up, |
| 0:36.9 | that's not even what you typically do, and you pull it out and the bag rips. All the juice get on your shoe. Yeah, I actually feel weird throwing liquid away unless it has like a sealed top. Yeah. Yeah, like a bottle. Yeah, trash juice ain't it. But with that said, we're basically talking about which foods you can't jump on |
| 0:55.5 | the ground yeah so wet foods is out we were we were hiking today me deion his cousin uh feel |
| 1:03.0 | and Courtney Haynes and Dion posed a question like if food dropped on the ground your plate |
| 1:07.3 | dropped on the ground um but you you're you got you're gonna you're down bad right now you can't |
| 1:13.3 | afford to like cook something else would you eat it off the ground i was like it depends it depends |
| 1:18.0 | on how much debris is on it like you pick it up it's just like where are we hair it's it's on the street |
| 1:22.9 | let's say you're at home oh this is your floor yeah this is your floor. Yeah, this is your floor. So this is |
| 1:27.5 | a hygiene issue now. Well, I mean, |
| 1:29.7 | it's sort of, but it also depends on the food. Because, like, Leah said, if it's soup, soup ain't happening. Soup is off. Soup's out, right? Soup's not happening. Here's the thing, but I'm like, soup is crazy. What if it's cake, though? If it's cake and it falls over, you just take a night |
| 1:42.7 | Cake is like has a wetness to it |
| 1:44.2 | where stuff would stick to it |
| 1:45.8 | Yeah but you just slice |
... |
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