Hi everybody. Thanks again for tuning into the women's dating and confidence podcast. You're going to want to listen up in this episode if you feel like you are always dating the wrong guy or he seems really nice at first,

but then he doesn't treat you well during the course of your dating or relationship. And if you

want to start dating guys who actually treat you well. So before we get started, it's really

important to realize that we cannot control what other people do,

but we do control what we do and how we react to what they do. So in the episode about toxic

relationships, I compared a toxic person to a cup of poison, And that person being toxic does not affect you unless

you decide to continue spending time with them in the same way that a cup of poison does not

affect you unless you pick it up and drink it. So this episode is about what you can influence

and what you can control when it comes to how guys treat you.

So the first reason that you may be dating guys who are not treating you well is because you tell them something's okay, but you continue seeing them anyways.

And you're communicating your standards, but you're not actually

enforcing them. And so I have a rule of thumb, which is that if your words and your actions are not

aligned, the guy will always listen to your actions instead of your words. So an example of this is I had a first date planned like

six years ago with some guy from work and he kept postponing it like the night of. He kept saying,

oh, actually an hour later, an hour later, an hour later, until instead of 5 p.m., we were meeting at 9.30 p.m.

And I went into the city to go meet him. And at 9.30, he, no, at like 9.40, I texted him like,

hey, where are you? And he was like, oh, I'm really sorry. I'm almost there. And long story short, I ended up waiting like 55 minutes.

And even though the entire time I told him that I didn't want to wait or it wasn't cool that he

was late, my actions were not aligned. So I told him one thing that it wasn't okay, but my action said

something else, which is that I'll wait for you as long as you take. So it's really important to

realize that we not only communicate with our words, but we also communicate with our actions,

and our actions, of course, speak louder than words.

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