#290: Cave Man (John Spies)
Ari Shaffir's Skeptic Tank
Ari Shaffir
4.6 • 6.7K Ratings
🗓️ 4 May 2017
⏱️ 119 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
John Spies sat down with me on the deck of the Cave Lodge in Soppong to tell me all about cave exploration and the unique life that he's built in northern Thailand. The man has lived an amazing life. And this pit stop on his way from Australia to Europe has now lasted over a quarter century.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Eventually they found a body a bit further down from the cave, she had been injected with heroin, |
| 0:06.2 | raped, strangled with a jungle vine and a body just left out in this creek bed and then things got pretty intense. |
| 0:30.0 | Before we get started I just want to clear something up. I left. I've been gone for four months and the reason was the pressure was just it was getting too much. |
| 0:48.0 | The way I was feeling being come after by Sigura and Chrysher it was scary it was frightening. I would have his henchmen, Sigura's henchmen, they're all over. |
| 1:06.0 | They're all over. These ladies and men in high-waisted pants with I don't know what kind of weapons in their pockets. |
| 1:15.0 | Pay up, pay up they don't say. I got bangs on my door, knocks on my door in the middle of the night. Hey, hey, Jew, that's what they call me, Jew. It's time to collect. |
| 1:25.0 | I was in fear, I was in fear, I was hiding in my closet, hiding, shivering in my closet. Like my grandfather did in 1933 Romania. |
| 1:36.0 | He has, he has, every since Tom got on Netflix his tastes have gotten, how shall I say this nicely, posh. |
| 1:45.0 | I talked to Christina about it. You know when his midnight snack is when he wakes up in the middle of the night, this was she told me, this was Christina Prasitzki told me. He's caviar as his midnight snack. |
| 1:55.0 | He said, he said, it's low in carbs and poor people can't afford it. I know he has trouble sleeping hotels now because they don't have the 3500 thread count sheets that he's used to at home. |
| 2:11.0 | 3500. So, when he won this bet, he was going to go to some crazy place. If Bert won, no big deal, you know. If Bert won, he would want to go to like a Fairfax High Football game. |
| 2:23.0 | I'm going to buy everybody a high cocoa, but that's not what happened. Unfortunately for me, that's not what happened. So I had to leave. I couldn't just, I couldn't just disappear into America because Tom has operatives all over. |
| 2:37.0 | He's a very popular guy. His operatives all over and I'd be found. So I had to leave the country. Did I miss anything? I was gone. |
| 2:48.0 | I can't wait or catch up. I got this ticket to a Prince concert. I'm going to see Charlie Murphy next week. I'm really excited to be home. |
| 2:55.0 | But when I was gone, I had some soul searching to do. When I first went to a monastery in Himalayan, I studied with a shaman for a long time. |
| 3:07.0 | I did a lot of ayahuasca in mushrooms. They have a special kind of mushroom up there. Helped you see your inside. |
| 3:13.0 | And my shaman was like, look, look inside you and consider the bets you've made in your life. And I did. I did consider the bets. |
| 3:20.0 | And I realized that I've never shirked on a bet in my life. Not once. I've paid off bets that have hurt me in ways that no one can even understand. |
| 3:28.0 | I had to get a nipple pierced once because I thought Anderson Silva would be Chris Widman. I made a bet on that. |
| 3:35.0 | One time, I don't even know what I lost this bet on. I had to wear a diaper for 24 hours. Couldn't shit or piss anywhere except in the diaper. |
| 3:43.0 | I was allowed one change of diaper. I had to walk around with shit and piss in a diaper. That's what I was a kid. This was fucking six years ago. |
| 3:51.0 | I lost a basketball game to a sleeper cell member Nick Yusif, who stationed here waiting for the call. |
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