Hello, hello, and welcome to the new mindset who this podcast my name is case Kenny at case.cannyon

Instagram and this is my weekly podcast where I create short no BS episodes dedicated to helping you be the person

you are meant to be leave your comfort zone and live a fulfilling and purposeful life. Let's go.

All right welcome to episode 277. Hello my friend. Welcome to a fresh new episode of new mindset who this thank you so much for listening for supporting me for subscribing for sending the podcast to friends and encouraging them to listen.

I've got a great topic for you today that I think we could all relate to in some sense I think it's a bit it's a bit triggering. It's what to do what to think what your mindset should be when you're faced with the familiar story of when a relationship falls apart and dissolves whatever but then that person comes back begging to be back with you wanting to try again saying the same thing.

Now this could be an ex it could be someone from an almost relationship it could be someone who straight up rejected you someone who said they weren't available but now they want to give it a shot.

It's a it's a story is old as time you know I've been there certainly I've been there on on both sides of that equation in fact now that I think about a both the person who leaves

it but then you know wants back and I've also been the person who is faced with the decision of what to think or what to do when someone wants to try again with me so I want to talk about this briefly because I've learned a lot being in these situations and I think I have a mindset here that is really centering and will empower you to just do what's right for you.

And that at the end of the day is all you can ask of yourself doing what's most compassionate for you so I'm going to hop right into it here's my quick plug I say it in every episode so apologize but here I'll say it in one breath so I get it out but you know I gotta I gotta do what I gotta do the episode is for you but the plug is for me so here it is if you're digging what I'm talking about and enjoying the podcast it mean a lot to me if you share with a friend just send them the link and tell them.

And if you want more if you want to bring this mindset to life I recommend journaling and you could pick up a journal or two and new mindset who does calm there it is more or less one breath but that's it that's okay so let's get into this topic here again it's what to do what to think when they come back when someone tries to come back into your life someone from an old relationship well to start I will say I think I always say I think I always say that I need to come back and I want to do this because I want to do that and I want to do that and I want to do that.

Well to start I will say I think I always think it's a bit amusing how I come up with the ideas for these episodes and this one came to me this past week because I was scrolling through a certain website that I frequent and I won't say the name because I can sometimes be a little critical of them but there is this headline from an article there just boom in your face big bold headline and it said if they love you they'll come back.

So I open this article gave it a quick read and of course I respect the author I respect anyone who puts their thoughts on paper in a video online whatever there's no hate there but you know I was reading this article and it was talking about how you know true love always brings people back together that no matter what happened no matter how much someone might have hurt you no matter how much time has passed that if they love you they will never be able to come back to you.

And I don't know no disrespect that offer of course but I think that I think that's a bit of BS respectfully with a smile on my face I think that's BS like I mean in theory like it sounds good right like yes love is this incredible connecting force between two people and it's what allows people to navigate the ups and downs of a relationship of course yes.

I buy into the idea that soulmates are meant to be together but this idea that if someone leaves you that you know they'll they'll come back because they love you they'll be back they love me I just don't think that's a healthy mindset at all because the the the fact is they left you they decided that they had better options.

And in my mind it's not a healthy mindset to one expect that they'll come back to you or two even tolerate it if they do so in my mind and this will transition into the mindset I want to talk about here and why people do this why people come back.

It's you know if someone leaves you if someone decides they're not ready for you if someone decides that you know they're not available emotionally for you no matter if they quote come back because they love you.

You shouldn't be there waiting for them you shouldn't tolerate that you shouldn't be available anymore so anyway saw this article got a bit triggered decided to do this episode specifically on why people do this and what you should think why people come back to you because I think if we can break that down hopefully they will be less over thinking for you and for me when faced with the decision of what to do.

And then you could just do what's right for you so let's think about this and and maybe you've been in these situations before where someone tries to come back to you or maybe you haven't but I'm pretty sure at some point this will likely happen to you because it happens a lot because you know humans in decisive over thinking wrong priority humans.

So again so this could be following a mutual break up it could be following a three month long relationship and then they end up saying it's going to fast for them that they need to pump the brakes and then they leave in the relationship ends it could be following a year long relationship and they end up breaking up with you because they're like I'm just not ready for something serious.

It could be they straight up reject you early on and say they're not interested they're not ready to date right now they're not emotionally available or it could be the big one an X from your past from a serious relationship an X from a long term committed relationship that you were in that ended for any number of reasons right so that's the foundation here you have that and then boom today tomorrow they show up back in your life and they're saying things like

you know I don't want to let you go I didn't mean to let you go I want to try again I think we should give this another shot I didn't mean what I said my priorities were messed up then I messed up I'm ready now sound familiar little sound bites there.

Well, this happens a lot and I don't know about you but in that equation right there I'm hearing a lot of I I want to try again I'm ready I messed up I don't want to lose you I want you I'm ready.

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