241 Why do ADHDers Struggle with Self-Trust?

I Have ADHD Podcast

Kristen Carder

Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 12 December 2023

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

One thing that I’ve noticed in myself and other adults with ADHD that I coach is a massive lack of self-trust.

We don’t trust ourselves to follow through. We don’t trust ourselves to make good decisions. We don’t trust ourselves to manage money wisely or to curb our impulsive spending habits.

We don’t trust that we’re good parents or that we’re good at our jobs. We are never really sure if we’re doing “the right thing” or if we’re “on track” with where we’re supposed to be.

For the average ADHD adult, life feels very wobbly.

Instead of feeling grounded within ourselves like confident adults, we often look to others to gauge how we’re doing. I can’t tell you how many ADHDers I’ve talked to who seem to live by the motto, “If other people are happy with me, then I can be happy with myself.”

Well, that stops now. Join me for this 2-part series on How to Build Self Trust (yes, even with ADHD). In today's episode you'll learn why adults with ADHD don't trust themselves, and next week we'll discuss what we can do about it.

We would love to have you join us in FOCUSED!

Come hang out with me on Instagram HERE.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the I have ADHD podcast where it's all about education, encouragement and
0:11.2	coaching for adults with ADHD.
0:13.5	I'm your host Kristen Carter and I have ADHD.
0:17.5	Let's chat about the frustrations, humor, and challenges
0:21.1	of adulting, relationships, working, and achieving with this neurodevelopmental disorder.
0:27.0	I'll help you understand your unique brain, unlock your potential, and move from point A to point B.
0:34.0	Hey what's up, this is Kristen Carter and you're listening to the I have
0:41.0	ADHD podcast. I am medicated, I am
0:43.7	caffeinated, I am regulated, and I am ready to roll. It's so good to be here
0:49.1	with you today. I'm about to blow your mind with an intense episode on self-trust. This is going to be a two-parter,
0:56.0	this is part one, next week will be part two, and listen I think that self-trust is one of the most
1:01.6	often overlooked difficulties of somebody with ADHD.
1:05.9	We as a general rule seriously struggle to trust ourselves.
1:10.0	I mean for real for real this is a big thing now I've coached thousands of adults from all over the world and I happen to be an adult with ADHD myself and I can say with confidence that most of us struggle greatly with the ability to trust ourselves, our choices
1:24.9	and trust that we're going to follow through and do the things that we say we're
1:28.8	going to do. Am I right? I've got so many thoughts, which is why we're just diving right in.
1:35.2	Because this has huge ramifications on the way that we live our lives.
1:39.7	Because if I don't trust myself, then I'm going to agonize over my decisions.
1:44.1	I'm going to delegate my authority to the people around me, which means I'm living
1:48.4	reactively, not proactively. And I'll probably play really small because I don't know if I'll follow through.
1:55.6	So I'm going to have trouble committing to the things that I actually want to do
1:59.2	because I don't trust myself to see them through to the end.
	...

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