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On Attachment

#239: The Anxious Attachment Healing Roadmap

On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.91.2K Ratings

🗓️ 10 March 2026

⏱️ 26 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

If you've been putting in the work to heal your anxious attachment but still feel like you're treading water, this episode is for you. In today's episode, I'm sharing what I believe are the three core pillars of healing anxious attachment — and why the sequencing of that work matters just as much as the work itself.

Whether you're just starting out or have been on this journey for a while, having a clear roadmap can be genuinely grounding. Lack of effort is rarely the problem for anxiously attached people — it's about making sure that energy is directed where it will have the greatest impact.

In this episode, I cover:

  • Why the mindset you bring to this work is the real foundation — and how approaching healing from a place of shame will undermine everything else
  • Understanding your nervous system and building the capacity to self-regulate (hint: it's about much more than crisis management)
  • Identifying and shifting the negative core beliefs and core wounds that shape your relationships — and why real self-worth is built through doing, not just affirmations
  • Communication skills, boundary-setting, and voicing your needs — and why starting here without the previous two pillars often falls flat
  • The common pitfall that keeps so many people stuck, and what to focus on instead


🎉 Join the waitlist for the Healing Anxious Attachment 4-Year Anniversary Sale

On March 16, I’ll be celebrating four years since I first launched Healing Anxious Attachment. To mark the occasion, I’m bringing the course back to its original launch price of US$222 for 24 hours only.

If you’re curious, add yourself to the waitlist below — the anniversary offer will only be available for 24 hours and only for those on the list.

Join the waitlist at stephanierigg.com/haa-anniversary-sale-waitlist


Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

What I've dedicated my life to is revenge.

0:04.7

A brand new drama based on the best-selling novel.

0:07.5

They think they're better than us?

0:08.5

Who do you think you are?

0:09.8

I'm going to prove to them that they're wrong.

0:11.5

She's punishing me.

0:13.0

You destroyed my family.

0:14.3

I will not rest until I've destroyed yours.

0:17.0

A woman of substance on Channel 4 starts tonight at 9.

0:20.2

This is your latest project.

0:23.4

It's heavy with information, data and exactly 36 pages of waffle.

0:29.5

But with Acrobat Studio, you can create a PDF space, an AI-powered workspace that turns

0:35.2

documents into summaries and insights and even generates

0:38.7

reports or presentations out of it. So you can cut through the waffle, work smarter and save time.

0:45.3

Do that with Acrobat. Learn more and try it out on Adobe.com. Hey everybody, welcome back to another

0:52.0

episode of On Attachment. In today's episode, we are talking about

0:56.1

what it really takes to heal your anxious attachment pattern. So what are the steps involved? How do we

1:03.6

approach it? Where do we begin? What does it really take? What's realistic in terms of what to expect?

1:09.0

I really want to give you a clear roadmap of what that path looks like

1:13.3

because something that I know from having taught and supported many,

1:18.5

many people all over the world on this journey and having been through it myself,

1:22.6

is that A, knowing it's possible and really believing that it's possible

...

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